Dwell in possibility

Souvenirs from last weekend

2012-02-26T16:47:00.001-05:00

It's taken me a week to unpack and photograph our souvenirs from Kalamazoo, but I finally got it done.

The first came from Retro, the shop in downtown Kalamazoo that specializes in items from the 1940-1970s. It's a good thing this store is 2.5 hours away, and that I haven't found one like it ~~yet~~ nearby.

I saw these owl bookends made of solid wood for $20, and I had to have them. Love!

How could I not buy this magnet that Mike spotted in a specialty shop? It's now proudly stuck to the frig.

We usually buy a little something when we travel. Our preference has always been art, but sometimes that's just too expensive so we might grab a magnet or an ornament or just frame a great photo. What about you? Do you buy souvenirs when you go on vacation?

Michigan, our home

2012-02-25T23:23:00.003-05:00

The first few years Mike and I lived in Pennsylvania I didn't like it. The people were more aggressive, more hurried, and a bit ruder than the people in either Mississippi or Memphis. I was completely taken aback, and I wanted to go back to calmer, slower, nicer place. When people asked, "Do you like Pennsylvania?" I would say, "It's ok. It's very different from the south." In time I came to love it there, and I cried a lot when we moved.

I never did get used to life in Tennessee. The area was beautiful, but I felt out of step with calmer, slower, nicer south. I had somehow, in the six years up north, turned into a northerner. I missed the excitement, the diversity, the culture of the northeast. So, when people asked, "Do you like Tennessee?" I would say, "Oh, it's beautiful here" or "I love our house." I just left the rest out. We didn't stay in TN long enough for me to move past that stage.

BUT! I love Michigan. I feel comfortable and at home here. It's a good balance of the aggressive, hurried, ruder NE and the calm, slow, nicer South. The state is beautiful, and the people are diverse and kind. We can go to the theater or pick our own cherries on someone's farm. The medical community is very good here and so are the educational opportunities. Michigan is the first place we've lived that I can honestly say from the very beginning that I love.

Today was day two of the Rochester Fire and Ice Festival, not too far away. I forgot my camera and my iPhone so I don't have any photos, but last night's celebration made the Detroit news. Here's the clip:
Rochester Fire & Ice Festival kicks off with ice sculptures, fireworks, shopping.

Books for March

2012-02-24T12:14:00.000-05:00

Ack! I am very behind on my reading. I plan to start listening to audio books during my workouts. A mix of physical books and audio books should help me get through more material. Although, I am starting to think maybe I should listen to Spanish audio books or educational material so I can learn Spanish faster. Oh, the options!

That aside, March is Women's History month, and you know at least one feminist is very excited about that. I have chosen four books about (I hope) interesting women throughout history. Please vote for the one you think is most interesting.

Cleopatra: A Life by Stacy Schiff has been on my to-read list since it was published in 2010. It is the Pulitzer Prize winning book about the life of the last Queen of Egypt. I know a little about her life, but I'm not sure how much of it is true and how much is exaggeration or fantasy.

Published last year, Mary Boleyn: The Mistress of Kings by Alison Weir is one of string of books and movies about the Boleyn sisters. What I find appealing about this book is: 1) it's nonfiction and 2) it's about Mary not Anne, her sister. Mary Boleyn was born in 1499/1500 in England. She was the mistress of the English King Henry VIII (husband of her sister) and King François I, King of France.

I don't know anything about the life of Eva Braun except that she was the companion/lover of Adolph Hitler. I tend to feel sorry for her because she entwined herself with such an evil man but maybe I shouldn't??? I hope Eva Braun: A Life with Hitler by Heike B. Görtemaker will help me better understand Eva and her choices.

My family is full of veterans of all the wars, and I like to understand what they went through - as best as any civilian can. In 1966 a young woman, fresh out of college, left for Vietnam as a Red Cross volunteer. In Donut Dolly: An American Red Cross Girl's War in Vietnam, Joann Puffer Kotcher tells her story of her life in Vietnam.

Those are my selections for March. Which one sounds the most interesting to you? Please vote on the right hand side of the page. I would love to see everyone's opinions!

Midweek review

2012-02-23T23:29:00.002-05:00

I meant to blog yesterday, but the time just got away from me. Things are going very, very well here in Michigan.

I am still volunteering at the library on Tuesday mornings, and I still love it. This week I met a sweet lady from Mexico who has volunteered to help me practice Spanish. We will meet on Tuesdays after the ESL class, and I will speak Spanish with her. I hope this will help me improve faster. I understand a lot and I can read pretty well, but my speaking, my grammar is very bad.

Wednesday evening yoga and Spanish classes are going well. I had a little bit of a negative experience in Spanish with another student. Before class, I asked the instructor to conjugate the verb "ir", which means "to go", in the preterite. In other words, I wanted to know how to say "I went", "you went", "he/she/it went", "we went", and "you all/they went" in Spanish. One of the other students acted annoyed and said I was just confusing her. Later that night, when class was over, I asked about the future tense (I will go, etc.). This same student said she was leaving before I confused her anymore. I was a bit annoyed by her attitude. Aren't we all supposed to be adults in the class? Shouldn't we be helping and encouraging each other? I also mentioned, as a joke, that our last class we should all try to speak in Spanish, and the same lady said she wouldn't come to the class if we were only speaking Spanish. I hope she was joking, but she seemed serious. I was dumbfounded and a bit annoyed. I am eager and excited to learn Spanish (again). I want to be pushed and encouraged to learn, which is why I've asked my new Mexican friend to help me. Ah, well, next class is a new class. Maybe I'll move to a different seat! *grin*

Today I loved spending time with S. and Y., my Korean friends. They teach me something new every time I'm with them, and I hope I am teaching them something new too. They will be giving a few more people my contact information so maybe I will have new students soon. I am thinking of getting certified in ESL now. I really enjoy it, and I can always work full time at a company or school, if I want to. I will wait a little longer to decide just to make sure it's not a snap decision.

I was supposed to have coffee (tea, in my case) tomorrow with a German friend from ESL, but we are expecting a snow storm here so we have canceled. It's a little bit disappointing. I was looking forward to our chat. However, we will reschedule for next week.

Next week will be very busy, but I will try to blog often. Some exciting things will be happening!!

How has your week gone so far?

"Dream On" by Frugal Dad

2012-02-22T10:08:00.002-05:00

I saw this post entitled "Dream On: Why Sleep is So Important (Infographic)" by Frugal Dad this morning and thought it was too amazing not to share!

Source: http://frugaldad.com

Chelsea . . . briefly

2012-02-21T20:22:00.000-05:00

On the way home from Kalamazoo yesterday, we decided to stop in Chelsea, a small town outside of Ann Arbor. Unfortunately, many shops were closed on Monday, but we walked around reading plaques and poking around the places that were open.

Our first stop was the First Congregational Church (accidentally cut the top off - opps!). It was originally built in 1852, but the building burned in 1894. This building was erected in 1895.

Check out the amazing stained glass windows.

We walked around and discovered the Jiffy mix factory! I was very impressed!

Across the street from the Jiffy mix factory is the Glazier Stove Company Warehouse and Clocktower Building. I believe the building was completed in 1905, but it might have been 1907.

Next door is the Glazier Welfare Building, which was built in 1906 for the employees of Glazier. It was their recreational center. Now, there are "For Rent" signs in the windows. I'm guessing it's office space for rent and not apartment space.

Our last stop in Chelsea was . . . the LIBRARY! Yep. This amazing library was voted Best Small Library in America in 2004 and 2008. It is one cool building!

There is so much more to see and do in Chelsea so Mike and I are hoping to make it back for a longer visit. It's another lovely Michigan city.

Hopefully my occasional posts on Michigan will help to sway some folks' bad impressions of the state. Believe it or not, many people come here to vacation every year because they love it here. Crazy, right? Well, it's a pretty cool place. *grin*

Kalamazoo, MI

2012-02-20T20:16:00.003-05:00

This weekend Mike and I drove to Kalamazoo, Michigan for a getaway. There was no real reason for it. Mike had a day off today, and we felt like seeing a new MI city. I booked us at the Kalamazoo House Bed and Breakfast right downtown.

It is a wonderful Victorian home that was built in 1887. There are ten available rooms, all with private bathrooms. The food is fantastic, and the staff is lovely. Such a wonderful place.

On Saturday we toured MOST of the Kalamazoo Institute of Art (free of charge) located next door to the house.

Right now they have the artwork of local elementary and middle school students on display, and it is amazing! Those kids are doing things I could never do - pottery, jewelry, copper metal working, sculptures, drawings and portraits. Just amazing.

After the KIA closed, we found ourselves at the Kalamazoo Public Library. This is not too shocking, I know.

Inside the children's library are three framed stained glass art pieces. Here's Mother Goose:

After we left the library, we walked to the downtown area called the Kalamazoo Mall. We found a great store called Retro. Oh. My. Word. I only spent $25, but I could easily have spent ten times more.

The owners specialize in selling items from the 50's, 60's, and 70's. Love. Love. LOVE!! They have a petite grand piano (bottom of the page on the link) from the 1920's in excellent condition for $2500. Ooooooooooooo. How I want it!

We ate dinner that night and headed back to the B&B. On Sunday most places were closed, but the Kalamazoo Museum was open AND it was free.

It is a great museum that explains all kinds of history and science to kids and adults. Wonderful spot for little ones!

If you look closely, you'll see Mike at one of the stations. He had a great time with all the projects and games. Other adults were also there building cars and playing.

Mike's favorite displays were the guitars, of course. He loved the harp guitar. Too bad he couldn't play it.

We spent what was left of the day on Sunday walking around and eating dinner. We spent the evening playing cards and watching "Downton Abbey". Ah, lovely. Monday we traveled home without too many stops, as most businesses were closed. We did stop in Chelsea, outside Ann Arbor, on the way home. More on that tomorrow.

How was your weekend?

Offline for a few days

2012-02-17T15:08:00.001-05:00

Though we will have internet access, I will be offline for the weekend. Tomorrow morning Mike and I are off to Kalamazoo for a long weekend. We're not sure what we'll be doing for the next three days, but it will be a break from the norm.

Hope you all have a great weekend, and I'll be seeing you after the holiday weekend!

Happy Presidents' weekend!

Learning English

2012-02-16T15:46:00.000-05:00

Today was my first session with SK and YL (I don't want to use their names on the internet). Oh, it was very interesting. They are both very interested in increasing their understanding and speaking ability so I let them talk about whatever they wanted to talk about.

SK has only been in the U.S. for six months so her English is spotty, but her accent is good. She asked me questions about greeting people and told me a little about Korea. YL has been in the U.S. before and lived in Canada for a while so her English is pretty good. There are some words and phrases she doesn't know like "get along well together" so she wants to work on that. Also, she said that sometimes Americans speak too quickly so she wants to practice her understanding. She told me about her life and her family.

It was a good first day, I think. I hope I can help them with their English. SK told me she wants to teach me some Korean. I'm a little nervous about that. They have a totally different alphabet! Maybe I will know a lot Spanish and a little Korean by the end of 2012! That's more than I bargained for. *big grin*

If anyone has any resources for me to use to help SK and YL, please pass it along!

Surprise!

2012-02-15T12:55:00.002-05:00

This morning I decided to rearrange the plants by the sliding glass doors. (I will be so happy when it's summertime, and all the plants are outside.) I looked down and was startled.

Do you see it?

Closeup!

What am I going to do with it? It's alive. It's breathing. I can't throw it out in the snow. That's evil. I'm getting Mike to see if anyone at work has an aquarium or whatever. If not, I guess we've got a new pet until spring or until someone else wants him.

Anybody want a cool, yet slightly-creepy-looking silver frog???

Oh, shoot, in the process of writing this blog, froggie has disappeared. Good grief!

A new opportunity

2012-02-14T17:06:00.000-05:00

It's been a while since I have had an opportunity to really help someone else - or at least feel like I'm really doing something for someone else. Volunteering at the library once a week with the ESL conversational class has been a wonderful experience. I love talking to all the internationals, hearing about their cultures and families, and helping them practice their English. Today after class two of the Korean ladies approached me about tutoring them and their children in English. I happily, eagerly agreed. I did, however, explain to them that I'm not certified or anything like that, but it turns out that there is a one-year waiting list at the university. One of the ladies has been waiting four months so far, and the other was turned away because her English is too good. Apparently, the college will only accept the least fluent people.

I am very, very excited about this opportunity. I checked out a scad of materials from the library, but now I have to read! Yikes! I'm meeting with the ladies on Thursday, but it will be another week before I can meet with the kids.

If anyone reading this is an ESL teacher or student and has any advice, please pass it along.

Even cats can pitch fits

2012-02-13T12:50:00.000-05:00

For the past couple of days, Mittens has been begging to go outside onto the deck. Yesterday I captured his tantrum on video. It was 28 degrees with fierce winds, but he still wanted out. If you listen closely, you'll hear him cry and sneeze, and you'll hear Spooky's collar bell as he jumps off the couch to join Mittens. Mittens shows off his ADD and fear of all that moves in the clip too.

Mittens was doing the same thing again today, but I didn't let him out. What a spoiled monster!

Owl, anyone?

2012-02-12T15:14:00.000-05:00

My mom has loved owls for as long as I can remember. She loved owls before it was cool to love owls. We had owls all over the house when I was growing up. I think it was her grandma that said owls were good luck, and if that's true, we must have been super-lucky!

On Friday I was in one of my favorite places - the Salvation Army - and I was just poking around. What did I just glance up to see? An owl painting! Oh SNAP!! There was no frame, but it was the cutest darn thing and only $2.99. I'll be picking out a frame this week and hanging somewhere very visible so I can look at the cute little thing everyday.

Cold basements spoil movies

2012-02-11T12:38:00.002-05:00

Anyone else looking forward to the end of the election year? It's getting nasty, and our state hasn't even had our primary yet. Sheesh. People, be nice!

We're going to have a crazy slow weekend here. Mike's busy studying for his midterm and doing homework. He's upstairs since the basement is so cold so it's hindering me. I feel bad about making noises and moving around. I'm trying to convince him to go to the office to work, but he keeps saying I'm not bothering him. Hmph. I want to watch a French movie, but I can't. Oh, the challenges of grad school and cold basements!

What fun things are you up to this weekend?

The week

2012-02-10T15:43:00.000-05:00

It's been a slow week here in Michigan. Mike's midterms are next week, which is bizarre. We're not used to spring break coming so early. The college here offers three equal length semesters - Jan-Apr, May-Aug, and Sept-Dec. Hopefully this will make his time in grad school shorter. It also gives him numerous breaks just no super-long break which is good, I think. In fact, we're planning a short getaway for this first break - something local and small. Yay! Time to make up for that LONG travel dry spell.

Other than school and planning, we've just been keeping to our schedules - work, volunteering, classes, reading. I joined a local social organization/club this week, but nothing has happened in the past few days. There are functions for the next couple of weeks, but nothing that interests me yet. I signed up for the March book club meeting. I read the book last year - ok, so I listened to it on audio book while I spackled, sanded, painted, and cleaned the den in the TN house. I liked the book so much that I figured I'd grab a copy of it and skim it before the meeting. Hopefully some more activities will come up in the next few weeks.

So, how was your week? Did you accomplish something amazing or important, or did you have a slow week too?

Two Is Enough

2012-02-08T11:05:00.000-05:00

     Last night I finished Two Is Enough: A Couple's Guide to Living Childless by Choice by Laura S. Scott. This book has been on my want-to-read list since it was published in 2009, and it did not disappoint. Scott spent four years researching, interviewing, and writing, and the product of all that work is informative, insightful, and encouraging.

     Scott explains who the childless by choice are, the top reasons why people choose to be childfree, the reactions to their decisions, and the concerns of the childfree. For those who have made the decision to remain childfree, much of the information and research will intuitively make sense. Those who are or have been criticized for their decision will feel relieved that they aren't alone and may find new ways of dealing with the attacks. For the people out there who don't understand how anyone could choose a life without children or who think the childfree are selfish or irresponsible, they will perhaps gain greater insight and see that those preconceptions are 100% incorrect.

     Mike and I are now in our 30s - mid-30s - and we have no children by choice. Since we've lived most of our married life north of the Mason Dixon, we've rarely received much criticism for our childfree status. By and large, our families are supportive of our decision; although, there are folks who would be happy, I'm sure, to see us change our minds. Could it happen? Of course. Will it happen soon? That's doubtful, but I make no promises either way.

    Scott identified four categories of the childfree:

Early articulators - those who have known from an early age that they didn't want to be parents.
Postponers - those who wait to have children and remain childfree.
Acquiescers - those who remain childfree because their partner wishes to remain childfree.
Undecided - those still in the decision making process.

    Believe it or not, some folks know from the time they are quite young - 12, 14, 16 - that they have no interest in raising a child. I started telling people I didn't want kids when I was 15. I babysat and worked at day cares, and while I like kids, I find them absolutely exhausting. The common response at that age is "Oh, you're young. You will change your mind." I'm 32 years old, and I haven't changed my mind yet. I am open to having my mind changed, but it hasn't happened yet. Oh, and don't worry or feel sorry for Mike. I won't tell his journey because it's his story to tell, but he's 100% childless by choice.

    In the book, Scott addresses the common misconceptions and the common criticisms leveled at the childfree. One is that the childfree dislike children. Mike and I both like kids. I especially like older kids - twelve and up. So, why not have a kid if you like kids? Well, liking kids and choosing to raise one and spend the rest of my life with one is very different. Another misconception, one that drives me crazy, is that the childfree are selfish. I still haven't riddled out the logic of this one. It's just false. The childfree donate their money to all sorts of causes, they volunteer at all sort of organizations, they take in relatives' children, and they care for their disabled siblings or parents. Since Mike and I do some of these things and are prepared to do others of these (like caring for aging parents, if necessary), I sincerely don't understand the label "selfish" and it does get my goat.

     On the subject of criticism, we haven't faced much of it. There is a distant cousin (I won't say which family) that seriously annoyed me once. She asked if we had children, and I answered no. She wanted to know why. I told her the truth - I've never had the desire to have children and without that desire, I don't think people should undertake the huge responsibility of child rearing. This was not a good answer apparently. She told me that I would be missing out on the greatest joy of life, and she hoped I would change my mind. Ugh. Think a minute. If a person does not have the desire to raise a child, why would you attempt to guilt them or pressure them into it?

     I have friends who still live in Mississippi who have chosen not to have kids - at least not yet. They undergo severe criticism from family members. When their siblings had children, the parents really started to pour on the guilt via attacks and "disappointment". I feel so badly for them. My parents are immensely supportive of us, and they tell everyone who asks that it's a private decision "between Mike and Rhonda. They will be the ones raising it, not us." I'm so grateful that we don't have to fight with either set of parents over this issue.

     On the related subject of adoption, Scott does not talk about this in the book, but it's come up for us. We have, more than once, discussed adopting an older child (over five). We have mentioned this with some family members. While some people are very supportive and get excited, we had one cousin loudly object. I was shocked! I had never heard anyone so adamantly declare that he wanted a child of his own DNA. "Don't you want a kid with your blood?" Huh? What's so great about my DNA? Just because it's mine? Wild. An adopted child is your child. That child is your family. I'm not hung up on my own DNA.

     Last note, also not much discussed in the book, infertility appears to be a growing problem. For this reason also, it is hurtful and rude to "jump" on people about having children. One of my good friends tried for two years to have a baby. She had acquaintances say to her, "Why don't you and ___ have kids? You'd be great parents." Well, it hurt my friend. She wanted a baby. Her husband wanted a baby. One day an acquaintance was busy fussing at her, and she broke down and loudly exclaimed, "I'm infertile! Stop asking!" She did end up having a baby after a miscarriage and fertility treatment. I have two other friends who have undergone extensive, invasive fertility treatments. One now has two children, and one is still not a mother. It is very, very painful for those childless NOT by choice. Until now, I have not publicly revealed our status. Most people who ask / asked me or my mom about babies or grandbabies didn't know / don't know that we are childless by choice. If we were infertile, their prying questions would be hurtful. I wish people would think before they ask.

     One of my goals in 2010 was to make this blog an authentic reflection of myself, of us. I wanted "to be more real". This is one of those posts in which I have revealed a little more about us. Hope it didn't / doesn't make anyone uncomfortable. Like all subjects, I'd love to discuss it and am open to hearing all viewpoints (except maybe the nasty, hateful ones).

Deboard

2012-02-07T19:26:00.000-05:00

My favorite Patti Digh's Life is a Verb concept, number three: get off the ship.

Over twenty years ago, Digh sailed around the world while working on a university study abroad program. She noticed that one girl never got off the ship. Digh asked the girl about it, and she said that she was afraid she would get lost in a foreign country. Digh asked her old she was, and the girl said, "Twenty." Digh then asked her how old she thought the average American woman lived to be. "Around eighty," the girl said. Digh quietly asked her if she thought she would stay lost for sixty years. The girl received the point, and she and Digh "got lost" at the next port.

The last section of Life is a Verb focuses on how our fears and insecurities keep us from living fully and completely. This always rings a bell with me because, like everyone else, I carry a lot fears around with me. I love being reminded that others carry their fears along with them, and I love hearing about someone setting those fears down to do something fun, crazy, and even "normal".

Is there a time when you just swallowed your fear and did something you really wanted to do?

Cat fight

2012-02-06T22:03:00.001-05:00

I'm a little late posting tonight, but earlier this morning, I caught the boys in a short, playful fight. This isn't the most intense fight and it's not the best angle, but you'll get the idea.

There's no sound and it's about one minute long.

Red convertibles

2012-02-05T12:50:00.000-05:00

My favorite Patti Digh's Life is a Verb concept number two: rent a red convertible.

I don't think this idea is foreign to anyone reading. I heard it presented in church, read it in books, and listened to speakers deliver it during lectures and seminars. Digh tells a story about her family going on a road trip, and to do so her husband rented a red convertible. Apparently, Digh was concerned about his choice because red convertibles are much more expensive than, say, a Ford Focus. However, her husband made the decision because he felt it would be a memorable experience for their kids, who, in fact, were insanely thrilled and excited that their dad rented a convertible.

The point she makes in this section is the one we've all heard: enjoy life and take advantage of a few frivolous, fun things because life is over in a blink.

I'm blogging about convertibles because two things stuck me when I read it: I've been doing this since the house sold (not convertibles but taking advantage of life's brighter spots) and don't do this to excess.

Sold house. Time to live it up a little.

Depending on the person reading this, the thought will be "Yeah, a little too much" or "What are you talking about????" By nature, I am ~~cheap~~ frugal. Relevant examples:

After Mike and I got married, I told myself that we would leave the country at least every three years. The last time we went overseas was 2007, and it was Mexico. Before that in 2005, we spent one day in Canada. Before that, it had been our honeymoon in 2002.
I had the same, cheapo cell phone and cell package for six years, and I had the smallest package available.

I still have the camera I got in 1998 to go to Honduras. I upgraded to a digital in 2005 and used it until a lovely couple gave us their MUCH better digital camera. Still, it is an older model - about 2002.
We run our cars into the ground. We bought the Toyota in 2006 when my 1993 Sable radiator blew up and cracked the engine block on the interstate on the way to a performance. Mike is driving a 1991 Aerostar that's worth about $200 and needs $2000 worth of repairs.

So, tired of being constrained by a troublesome house, a job that wouldn't allow us to travel, and living in a perceived state of deprivation and want, I made the decision after the house sold to actively change some things. First, we went to Spain. I was so tired of being trapped by a house and a crappy job that I literally wanted to run away so we did. It was magical. Second, I got an iPhone. I brought my sad, technological self into the 21st century and also "replaced" the dead iPod, which couldn't run without being plugged in anymore - two birds, one iPhone (which also functions as an ereader so three birds!). Third, we are investigating and saving for a new camera. Yes, a nice, current model, take-pictures-of-polar-bears camera. It's TIME! Lastly, we are soon to begin the process of researching and hunting for a new/used car for Mike. Oh, jeepers!, is it time!

Something snapped for me during the process of trying to sell the house. I just kept thinking, "If this is all there is to life, this sucks!" Driving twenty hours twice a month to babysit a house I'm not living in, fussing with my husband about a dirty apartment, having no friends, no hobbies and no life for months - it was awful. Nope. Life's way too short. There have to be a few things that make you smile everyday and a few things that make you jump up and down during the year.

You're not made of money so slow your roll.

Then there is the key concept: moderation! We would love to retire and ride off into the sunset someday so you can't make your whole life a party (unless your that Zuckerberg kid who created Facebook). Our whole society appears to dwell in a state of expenditures, luxury, and DEBT. This is not the train I signed up to ride so I recognize the need to curb my consumerism and not just blow all our dough.

I liked this particular lesson because it reinforced my current plan, but the frugal angel (or devil) that sits on my shoulder reminds me not to enjoy to excess.

I have no idea if this is helpful or interesting to anyone out there. I'd just like to encourage my fellow frugalites to perhaps indulge on one thing that will make you smile everyday - an iPod, a new phone, a new purse, a golf club. I don't know. Something. Just don't go completely over to the dark side.

Grapes?

2012-02-04T13:09:00.000-05:00

I mentioned yesterday that I'm reading Life is a Verb right now ~~along with two other books~~. It actually isn't what I thought it would be. It's divided into nine chapters and each chapter has multiple "action" activities or to-dos. You're supposed to do them for 37 days. Yeah, you know I'm not going to do 50 things for 37 days. I wouldn't remember it all unless I had a massive list. . . to add to my other massive to-do list. No. Not going to happen.

However, I think Patti Digh does have some interesting stories and ideas. I thought I'd spend the next few days sharing my favorite ones here on the blog. So, today I'll share about "the grape". (Note: I'm using my words, my language shorthand to tell this story so if you want the "real" story, get the book.)

Patti's youngest daughter found this teeny, tiny grape and became fascinated with it. She put it up in a jar and toted it around everywhere. Of course, the grape shrank and shrank and still the little girl would stare at it, talk to it, and carry it around. It was very precious to her.

The point of this particular story, I believe, is twofold. One, as adults it is challenging sometimes to have that sense of wonder, curiosity, and fascination with the small, mundane things in the world like shriveled up grapes. Let's face it, I just throw them away. Digh challenges her readers to find wonder, creativity and joy in ordinary, small things.

Two, small children have a much easier time carrying their treasures with them. Think of Linus' blanket. We learn pretty quickly in preschool or kindergarten that can get you teased or beat up when you take your favorite object with you everywhere so we stop doing it. Digh challenges readers to actually carry around something of importance to look at throughout the day. She suggests pulling it out when you're feeling annoyed or angry and focusing on that positive object or photo instead of your irritation. I thought that was pretty good idea.

I'm not really sure what my grape is or grapes are. For me, I think they are mostly people (including the boys, of course) and places. I don't know that I'm too hung up on actual objects. There are a few rocks that totally and completely fascinate me, knowing the conditions under which they formed and how old they are, but we can chalk that up to being a geologist.

What about you? Do you see the beauty and creativity in the mundane? Do you have a grape?

Book overload!

2012-02-03T15:35:00.002-05:00

I think I might have overloaded myself with books. Here in Michigan if you have a registered library card, you can check out books from any library in the state, and you can do it all online. I used the interlibrary loan system (called MeLCat) to check out Life is a Verb and Two Is Enough, which are both good books. Unfortunately, they both came in at the same time and a third book called Thinking, Fast and Slow also came in. The latter is an in depth nonfiction book about how we think, and there are 26 holds on it so there will be no renewing. Ahhh, I need to set up big chunks of reading time!

Even though Life as a Verb didn't win the poll, there are several ideas in there that I'd like to share over the coming days. Today, however, I have to get a jump on my reading!

Happy Friday!

Lacking motivation

2012-02-02T18:03:00.002-05:00

Yesterday I was very busy working around the house. I kept the computer shut and the t.v. off, and I got a lot of work done. Unfortunately, I am backed up on correspondence, paperwork, and some projects I started so I need multiple days of intense work. I needed to be jazzed today. That didn't happen.

Mike convinced me to start going to Wednesday evening yoga. I know that I need to go. I know it's good for me. BUT, I find it frustrating at this point. I can remember how strong and flexible I was two years ago, and it's frustrating to have lost so much. I pushed through last night with only a little pain.

After yoga, I drove to Spanish and had a great night, as usual.

Today I woke up mildly sore from yoga, but I thought, "No, I'm going to the gym, and I'm going first thing this morning so I can't back out." I planned to use the treadmill to walk out the soreness. Nope. Had to use the eliptical machine. Now, I love the eliptical, but my heart rate is always faster on the eliptical than on the treadmill going the same speed. When I'm exhausted and hurting, I'd rather walk, but it didn't happen today. As soon as I left the gym, I started to get very sore. Then I had a brief wisp of a thought: hamburger and large coke! No, I didn't do it, but I confess my evil thoughts to you, my reader.

I've spent the entire day being lazy. I did do some computer chores, but that doesn't count. I didn't even want to write this post. *grin*

So, how do you deal with exercise fatigue? Do you walk it out or sleep it out? Any good tips for the future? I'm planning to hit the gym tomorrow, and again I'm planning to walk. We'll see.

One month check

2012-01-31T15:53:00.002-05:00

One month check-in:

1. Get a handle on my health.
a. Get a physical. In progress. Mid-March!
b. Start regular exercise with cardio. Check.
c. Get my hearing checked. In progress. Have to negotiate with the insurance company.
d. Investigate Lasik. Check.

2. Start volunteering. Check.

3. Take some Spanish classes. Check.

4. Learn some basic sewing techniques. Haven't started yet.

5. Discover and implement more eco-friendly habits and products. Haven't started yet.

6. Consistently keep a reading journal. Check.

7. Invest our house money. Haven't started yet.

Hope this first month of the year has been good for everyone! I am getting ready to sign up for another eight weeks of Spanish and am thinking about adding another volunteer job, but maybe I should just work on #4 and 7!

Remembering Glacier

2012-01-30T18:52:00.001-05:00

Not much to say today. It was a relatively normal, dull day here so I thought I would share a photo of a place I love: Glacier National Park in Montana. Sure would love to see it this time of year with all the snow on the ground and in the air. It's on my bucket list.

Iceburg Lake Trail, Glacier National Park, Montana

2005

Snow for your birthday?

2012-01-29T19:11:00.001-05:00

Today was Mike's birthday, and we enjoyed a birthday meal (free for him) and a little snow!

This is my first attempt to download a video and post it so I'm sorry if it's not so hot. I also apologize to everyone who is disappointed by the pitiful amount of snow we received.

Maybe my next video will be of the cats fighting or something more exciting.

Photo? Anyone?

2012-01-28T14:10:00.001-05:00

Why is it that when I take a photo no one is looking?

Hope everyone is enjoying their Saturday. I hear that it's warm beautiful in MS. It's lovely here in MI now that the snow moved out but not so warm. We're playing bums today and chillin' with the kitties. (I really need to clean, as evidence by the background. *pfftt*)

Happy weekend!

February's reading choices

2012-01-27T10:33:00.001-05:00

I'm running a little late posting the book choices for February. It completely slipped my mind. Next month, I'm working on books with numbers in the titles. These are pretty self explanatory so I don't think long explanations are needed to describe them.

The Five-Second Rule and Other Myths about Germs: What Everyone Should Know about Bacteria, Viruses, Mold, and Mildew by Anne E. Maczulak
Because science is cool.

Life Is a Verb: 37 Days to Wake Up, Be Mindful, and Live Intentionally by Patti Digh
This one might need a little background. Digh's stepfather was diagnosed with lung cancer and died thirty-seven days later. The question that emerged in Digh's mind was, "What would you be doing today if you only had 37 days to live?" and a book was born.

Two Is Enough: a Couple's Guide to Living Childless by Choice by Laura S. Scott
This is a subject I feel pretty passionately about, and I'll be reading this book and reporting on it regardless. As a CBC (childless by choice) woman, especially one from the South, it's nice to have some reaffirmation.

Origins: the Extraordinary New Science of Life before Birth (How the Nine Months Before Birth Shape the Rest of Our Lives) by Annie Murphy Paul
I find all this science so fascinating. Yes, I am a nerd and a proud one. *grin*

Backing the "crazy" (again)

2012-01-26T18:24:00.000-05:00

During the past few weeks, more and more people have been voicing their political views via blogs, Facebook, and emails. I rarely get offended, but I do often roll my eyes. The posts or emails are, unsurprisingly, unbalanced and rarely welcome discussion. I think that's unfortunate.

My parents raised me to never discuss religion or politics. Truthfully, while I don't want to fight or lose relationships over these things, I do think the subjects should be discussed respectfully. Of course, that rarely happens, as evidenced by the debates and the hostile posts / emails popping up everywhere. It's too bad.

Mike and I are not shy about sharing our views on our favorite candidate, who hasn't changed since the last presidential election, but we don't talk specifics unless asked. We are rarely asked. Apparently, people think our guy is crazy. I'll gladly take crazy over the status quo.

Here's my contribution to the political posts of the past few weeks; however, if you wanna talk about it, feel free to post a comment, send an email, or give me a call. I love a good discussion. *wink*

Lasik

2012-01-25T15:48:00.000-05:00

Today was my big day in Ann Arbor with one of the leading Lasik surgeons. It was a very positive experience. I had many, many tests done, and my eyes are perfectly healthy aside from moderate nearsightedness and moderate astigmatism in both eyes. I am a good candidate for Lasik. . .

. . . but I have elected not to have the surgery. My rationale is multifaceted. First, to have the doctor perform the surgery will cost $4300. Of course, he is not just any doctor. He is one of the leading doctors in Lasik and helped develop the current laser technique. I chose him because he's one of the very best, and I only wanted the very best working on my eyes. I could have a fellow do the surgery for $2900 or a 3rd year resident do it for $1800. I would only want the doctor. No offense to the students.

Second, the main reason I wanted the surgery is so I can ditch the glasses. According to the doctor, the odds of needing glasses even after the surgery is 1 in 200. Those odds just weren't good enough for me. I don't want to pay all that money, undergo elective surgery and still have to wear glasses.

Third, the worst case scenario (which I'm not that worried about with the doctor but would be with a fellow or resident) is that there is permanent damage to my eyes, meaning that I, the in very worst case, I could need a cornea transplant. This would mean a tremendous amount of money and time to fix, if it's even fixable.

Finally, in about ten years I will probably have to have reading glasses anyway. Lasik doesn't eliminate the problems that come with age and loss of close vision is an issue that develops with age. So, in roughly ten years, I'll have to have glasses anyway.

If I had a job or hobbies that made glasses or contacts a nuisance like skiing, swimming, diving, or even acting, I would probably go through the surgery. In reality, for me, it's just a vain procedure. I mean, let's be honest. So, here we are again: do "x" or take an awesome vacation. And here I am again voting for a vacation!

Mike drove me to Ann Arbor since I had my eyes dilated, and I told him on the way home, "I'm feeling a lot less guilty about getting the iPhone since I'm not getting Lasik!" He just laughed.

I guess it's not too early to start taking recommendations for vacation destinations. Maybe we can take a short trip over Mike's spring break and a longer one for summer break. *smile* So, where did you go on your favorite vacation?

Volunteering

2012-01-24T13:59:00.001-05:00

Today was my first day to volunteer at the library. I was part of the English Language Conversation Group. It was so much fun! My group included folks from South Korea, Turkey and Italy. Other nationalities included Germans, Czech, Iranians, Pakistani, Indian, Mexican, Colombian, Brazilian and Chinese. Today we discussed gestures. I learned a lot of interesting things about their home countries, and I hope they learned a few things about U.S. culture.

The group only meets on Tuesdays so I might look into volunteering somewhere else one day a week. I'm trying not to obligate myself too much too quickly, as I usually do. I don't want to over-commit and then burn out. It does feel very good to have fun with people and be useful.

Tomorrow is a big day for us! Mike is going to drive me to Ann Arbor for my Lasik evaluation, which will involve dilating my eyes so I can't drive home. Then, tomorrow night is my Spanish class.

Two fun days in a row!

Outliers

2012-01-22T20:28:00.001-05:00

I really enjoyed Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell. The entire book is about those unusually successful people - Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, professional athletes, etc. What makes a person wildly successful? Turns out it takes a lot - means, education, personality, the right birthday, hard work (a.k.a. practice) and usually lots of help. It's not all about talent. Don't be fooled.

Gladwell's book is easy to read, engaging, and thought-provoking. It reminded me of Freakonomics and Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother in its ability to challenge many of my preconceived ideas. Thumbs up!

Trading up

2012-01-21T22:08:00.001-05:00

Yesterday, after lots of debating and discussing, I decided that I would upgrade my phone. Here's the whole story.

I reluctantly joined the wireless world in 2006 when my family expressed concern about my long days to and from NYC. I got the cheapest plan and picked a free phone. I had not changed anything, including my phone number, since 2006. When we moved to Tennessee, I kept planning to change the number, but by the time I was ready to take action, it was obvious that we wouldn't be staying. I decided to wait until the house sold to change my number and upgrade my phone.

The house sold and the holidays ended so I started thinking about my wireless options. Then, last week my iPod decided to croak while I was at the gym. So, my cell was dying, my iPod was dying, and I had been wanting an ereader for traveling (traveling to Spain and the Christmas holidays created this desire). I started thinking about an iPhone. Being frugal, I really waffled on this. I could justify paying for the device, but could I justify the extra $30 / month on a data plan that I didn't need? For the record, Mike was extremely supportive and unhelpful. He kept saying, "If you want one, let's just go get it." Ugh, honey, help me think this out! "What's to think out? You want one; we have the money. Let's just go." It's never that easy for an over-analyzer.

Yesterday I had a lovely chat with a dear friend. She boiled it all down: "Rhonda, you're very frugal. You don't spend a lot of money on things. You've had a terrible couple of years. Sure, it's a toy but life is short, and if you'd like this toy, I say go for it." Well, I guess it was the encouragement I needed. I decided to get an iPhone.

Today, after receiving a discount for long time service ~~with a crappy phone~~, I walked out of the store with an iPhone 4S (16GB - what do I need a bigger one for???). I am happy with my new toy, and both Mike and I have played with it. I do feel a little guilty still. I mean, I don't work. I don't have a job that requires me to keep in touch with the world at all times. Plus, Mike has a pay-as-you-go phone. He just refuses to upgrade, even after I begged him. Fortunately, I can use my toy as a phone, iPod, Kindle, camera and more. Even if I ditch the phone plan in two years, it is a convenient little device.

Sometimes it feels like 2012 is the year to blow money, but that's really not the thought process. I feel like Mike and I have made do with a lot of things so we could save our money. We still had our dishes from college when we moved here. Wow! I guess I just want to bring us up to date. We bought new dishes, we bought a few things to make life here more comfortable (like shelves at a garage sale!), and now I have a new phone (I really wish Mike would have relented and gotten one too). Of course, there are other upcoming changes: we're going to buy slipcovers for the sofas, a new mattress for our bed, and I might get lasik. These are all things we've been discussing for years. While we have no house responsibilities, it's time to upgrade.

So, are there things you need/want to upgrade? Do you ever feel guilty about upgrading?

Me gusta mi clase

2012-01-20T10:09:00.001-05:00

This week was my first Spanish class. There are supposed to be ten of us in the class, but only eight showed up. A few facts:

The instructor has taught Spanish in high schools for sixteen years.
Of the eight people that showed up, five were women and three were men.
Two of the ladies are in their 60s. (Love it!!)
The three men are not US born: one is from Hong Kong, one is from India, and one is from Brazil. (The fellow from Hong Kong speaks four languages already, and I teased him that he made us all look bad.)
One of the ladies in her 60s was a college French professor.
I'm the youngest and the one with the most Spanish background.

We started with very basic Spanish. It is an eight week class so it's moving very fast, and I wonder how the others will do. I hope everyone sticks it out. It's much more fun to learn a language when everyone is there because they want to be and everyone is having a good time.

Ah! Me gusta español.

Ah, the snow!

2012-01-19T11:23:00.000-05:00

Of course, the sun is shining now. Weird weather around these lakes.

Ooo, I love making progress!

2012-01-18T22:50:00.001-05:00

Another annoying goal check in!

1. Get a handle on my health.
a. Get a physical. In progress. Scheduled for March.
b. Start regular exercise with cardio. Check. Going to the 3-4 times a week at this point. Note: Mike went to a lower intensity yoga class tonight that I will start going to probably in February. Working on my flexibility is a new goal for 2012.
c. Get my hearing checked. In progress. Still trying to figure the insurance stuff out. Ugh.
d. Investigate Lasik. Check. My assessment will be next Wednesday.

2. Start volunteering. In progress. Never heard from the library so I will be contacting the Veteran's Hospital shortly.

3. Take some Spanish classes. Check. Started tonight, and I loved it!

4. Learn some basic sewing techniques. Haven't started yet.

5. Discover and implement more eco-friendly habits and products. Haven't started yet.

6. Consistently keep a reading journal. Check.

7. Invest our house money. Haven't started yet. I have to do this very, very soon.

Blah days

2012-01-17T17:05:00.002-05:00

For the last two days Mike and I have been exhausted. I'm not sure why. The weather maybe. It's been raining and snowing. Ugh. There is very little to blog about since we've been mostly sleeping, watching t.v., and surfing the web. What would we ever do without technology?

How has your week gone so far?

Internally Flawless (IF)

2012-01-15T16:55:00.002-05:00

Yesterday Mike and I went to the jewelry store to have my engagement ring cleaned and checked (to make sure it wasn't loose). I happened to mention that this year would be our tenth wedding anniversary. The store manager excitedly told us about her newest diamond - a one carat, princess cut, internally flawless rock. She hurried behind the counter to the box she had hidden it in. Even the other employees hadn't seen it so they scurried around her behind the counter. When she unveiled it, smiles stole across all their faces.

"I have worked here for fifteen years, and I have never had an internally flawless diamond in the store!"

While she was shuffling, I caught the price of the rock - just the rock, not the band - $8200! Yeah, right. She explained that we could just exchange my diamond for hers and pay the difference. Sure, lady. Sure. I can tell you that Mike didn't pay $8000 for my ring. He didn't pay $7000 or even $6000 for my ring - the WHOLE engagement ring, let alone the diamond. We told her we'd think about it. (It was a super-quick thought.) The employees were still gathered around it still murmuring, "It's so beautiful," as we left.

I told Mike later that I'd never want him to spend that much on a diamond, and he said, "That's a vacation - the difference between the two! I know you'd rather have the vacation." Darn tootin'! It was a beautiful stone though.

What do you think? Would you take the diamond or a vacation?

Saturday

2012-01-15T00:00:00.001-05:00

I had just a wonderful Saturday with Mike. This is actually somewhat rare, or has been over the past two dreadful years. It didn't start out all that fabulous though. We got our allergy shots this morning and then went to the gym, which probably should have been done in reverse order. Neither of us finished our (planned) long workouts because we felt generally crappy.

Later we went to eat at Abuelo's. Yes, this is a terrible thing to do when you're trying to lose massive amounts of fat, but we do it so seldom. It was lovely. I was also able to talk Mike into going shopping. . . for himself! Ah, it was so fun! Shirts, shoes, sweaters.

We capped the night off with a young Colin Firth movie and computing in bed. What a great day!

What did you do with your Saturday?

Two weeks down, fifty to go!

2012-01-13T12:47:00.002-05:00

Things are progressing nicely so far in 2012. I did go to the gym yesterday, but I didn't do yoga. I was at the dentist during yoga class, but I did workout. (Teeth are in good shape, by the way.) Mike and I are planning to take Sunday afternoon's yoga class. Hopefully, it won't be so brutal.

This morning I set up a screening appointment down in Ann Arbor for LASIK. AA, as I call it, is a little over an hour away, but it's the medical mecca of the state. My doctor is one of the researchers who specializes in LASIK techniques and advancements. I'm not getting "quack" vibes from him, certainly. I will go in for a two to three hour screening later this month.

Mike heard from HR this morning regarding an audiologist. Sure thing, no audiologist within a fifty-mile radius accepts our insurance. They have given us options as to how to proceed. I have to start down that path on Monday.

Mike finished his first week of classes. I don't think it's been long enough to say whether or not he likes it. He's not thrilled about night classes though. He came home after work on both Tuesday and Thursday and complained about having to go to class. Not a great start, but he has at least three more years of it so he better shake out of it.

My Spanish class starts on Wednesday, and I'm very excited. I hope this isn't one of those classes where everyone is actually a pretty good speaker, and I'm the only moron who sounds like a cave woman.

In the negative column, it has been over a week, and the staff at the library has not contacted me regarding volunteering. I'm not surprised since they do have a lot of volunteers, but I am a little disappointed. I have decided to wait until next Thursday (a good two weeks), and then I will begin contacting other places like the VA.

How was your second week of 2012?

2012 Reading list

2012-01-11T12:46:00.001-05:00

Aside from the monthly books chosen via polls, I have a list of books that I'd like to read in 2012. I saw this idea somewhere last year so I wrote down the books I really wanted to tackle. I discovered last month that I'm not the only person who does this. Mike's cousin Stacey posted her list last month, and she linked to Life As a Mom's book list. So, it seems that I'm not original; I'm just behind.

I usually try to keep my reading very open. Our library gets in dozens of new nonfiction books every month and many of them interest me. I never can predict which one will grab me at any particular time. Such being the case, I selected mostly fiction for my want-to-read list for 2012.

Harry Potter (the entire series) by J.K. Rowling
His Dark Materials series by Philip Pullman
Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte
Great Expectations by Charles Dickens
The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas
Les Miserables by Victor Hugo
Watership Down by Richard Adams
My Antonia by Willa Cather
Buccaneers by Edith Wharton
In Country by Bobbie Ann Mason
Wicked River: When the Mississippi Last Ran Wild by Lee Sandlin
Angela's Ashes by Frank McCourt

I am only listing twelve for now. Actually counting all the series books as individuals, that's eighteen books, I believe. I really hope to do better with my reading this year. I read a lot last year, but I deviated from my list. Of 33 books, I only read 12. That's 36%. Bad. I'm shooting for 100% this year!

Anyone else out there have a reading list for 2012?

Downward facing dog, anyone?

2012-01-10T21:59:00.000-05:00

This morning before I went to the gym I check all my online stuff - email, FB, blogs, internet forums. One of my NYC friends posted his plans for the day on FB - yoga. Big deal, right? Wrong.

I fell in love with B. during our acting classes. He is about ten years younger than I am, blond, thin, and genuinely a kind, affectionate human being. He lost his mom when he was young, and he and his dad never really worked through their grief. He talked about his mom a lot.

Two years ago B. was in a terrible accident and lost both his legs. He had been a dancer and actor. His whole life was chaos and devastation for a very long time. Today was B.'s first time back to yoga since he lost his legs. So courageous!

Today was my first day back to yoga after two years too. My own issues prevented my going to the gym too, but my problems pailed in comparison. What amazing people I met during my years in NYC - like B.!

So, with my friend's struggles in mind, I went to yoga class. Can I just say that it kicked my butt? Ugh, my back is aching something awful. I am terribly out of shape. So sad. I did finish the class though. I can't go back on Thursday because I'll be at the dentist. Of course, I might still be in pain on Thursday!

Ah, back in the saddle.

Assessments

2012-01-09T22:44:00.000-05:00

Mike and I signed up today for body composition assessments at the gym. Ugh. It's official. I am skinny-fat. Perfectly within my BMI zone and yet have way too much body fat. Sadness. Ah well, we can both correct our issues now that we have identified them.

In other news, I will not be making the January deadline for my audiologist appointment. Why, you ask? The closest doctor that accepts the new insurance plan the company adopted is in Toledo, Ohio. Yes! Toledo. Two hours away. HR is supposed to be looking into other options, but that might take a while.

Two bummer bits of news today, but it's alright. Tomorrow is my first yoga class in two years, and I know it will kick the day off right.

In progress on most fronts

2012-01-07T12:47:00.001-05:00

We're one week into the new year, and I thought I'd give an update since I have been working on it. (I will not do this every week.)

1. Get a handle on my health.
a. Get a physical. In progress. I have one scheduled for March. I couldn't get in any sooner.
b. Start regular exercise with cardio. In progress. I signed up yesterday and am supposed to start today. I have to kick this evil sinus headache first though.
c. Get my hearing checked. In progress. Trying to figure the insurance stuff out.
d. Investigate Lasik. In progress. Found a doctor just have to set up an appointment.

2. Start volunteering. In progress. Signed up with the library and am waiting for a response. If the library doesn't work out, I will be contacting the Veteran's Hospital.

3. Take some Spanish classes. In progress. I signed up, and the classes start next week.

4. Learn some basic sewing techniques. Haven't started yet.

5. Discover and implement more eco-friendly habits and products. Haven't started yet.

6. Consistently keep a reading journal. Check.

7. Invest our house money. Haven't started yet.

Using walls to free up space

2012-01-06T11:42:00.002-05:00

No doubt about it - we have downsized. The townhouse is about 400 sq. ft. smaller than our house, plus we lost our two car garage, our attic, and our barn. We've been racking our brains (pun intended) to think of new storage ideas. You might remember the shelf we converted into a pot rack. Well, we've been at it again.

Back in June, I found this metal coat rack at the Chattanooga Goodwill for $3, but I had no idea what I was going to do with it. Inspiration came before the holidays, but we put it up with week.

This certainly isn't all my jewelry, but it cleared out some space.

I also bought a wooden coat rack this summer, and I had no idea what to do with it either. But, never fear, ideas eventually come.

Some of my purses are a little sad looking. It's time to upgrade but don't judge.

We still have a lot of stuff that needs a home. It's mostly piled up in the basement in boxes. I have gotten rid of at least two car loads of stuff, and I'm sure there is more, if I just had the heart to do it.

Have you got any good ideas for maximizing space?

So Much for That

2012-01-05T12:47:00.000-05:00

It's taken me a long, long time to finally sit down with this book.

Plot:
Shepard Knacker has been wanting to move out of the country (to Africa), leave the work-to-live attitude of America, and live simply on much less money. He's decided to give his wife an ultimatum: come with me now or stay behind. Unfortunately, his wife just received very bad news from the doctor and needs Shep's health insurance and their life savings.

Thoughts:
When I first started the book, I thought it was brilliant. There are actually three medical subplots: the wife, the best friend's daughter, and the father. It's basically a book about how twisted the health insurance system is in this country, which is timely and thought-provoking.

As the story moved along, however, it became more sexual. That didn't necessarily bother me but the language? I don't know. Maybe I'm out of touch. I just kept thinking, "Do people really talk to each other like this???"

The biggest disappointment for me was the ending though. I'm not going to spill it here, but I will ask the non-rhetorical question: Why do many modern fiction writers end their stories with a happy-ever-after? The real world doesn't work that way. It's difficult for me to buy into these books. This one, in particular, is a book about an apathetic, at best, health care system, and it ends well??? I just think it's weird, I guess. I loved A Prayer for Owen Meaning and The Woman in White and Ethan Frome because they don't end the way I want them to. Shakespeare, Steinbeck, Hemingway - many of their works don't end the way I want either, but they are amazing writers (in my opinion). Ugh, where are the great realistic modern writers? (Suggestions for writers are appreciated.) I guess that's why I love nonfiction and am more drawn to it. Whether the events are good or bad, they are real.

Overall, I give the book three out of five stars. It wasn't a waste of time, but I probably won't reread it. One of these days I'll find a modern fiction writer I love. I think it might be time to give Bobbie Ann Mason's work or Jodi Picoult's a shot.

Started working on my goals

2012-01-03T22:21:00.000-05:00

Today I decided to start working on my goals. I registered for my first Spanish class, and I dropped off my volunteer form at the library. It will be a few days before I hear from anyone. Tomorrow I plan to call some doctors and set up medical appointments, and later in the week I will register with the university so I can work out on campus. Ah, starting out strong!

How are your goals coming along?

Back home in Michigan

2012-01-02T17:10:00.000-05:00

We arrived back in Detroit late last night. A nice snow dusting made some areas pretty dangerous, but thanks to Mike's excellent snow driving skills, we made it safely home. We have done nothing today, which is wonderful, but as the week progresses, we have to get back into the swing of things.

School starts this week! I think I heard teachers and professors all across the U.S. groan in unison. Mike, I think, is excited though. He's cleaning out his space in the basement and trying to mentally prepare for grad school (again). Sadly, it doesn't look like all his classes from UTC will transfer so we're in for a couple of extra terms. That's all right though. We're not going to dwell on the negative when everything else is going so well!

2012 goals

2011-12-31T16:33:00.003-05:00

I realize my annual publicblog goals aren’t exactly epic or life changing, but they are helpful byreminding me of things I want to do and holding me publicly accountable fordoing them.

For 2012 my goals are:

1. Get a handleon my health. This is a multi-prongedgoal. Start: immediately.

a. Get a physical. My last physical was 2.5years ago, and my cholesterol and triglycerides were a tad high. I’ve not always been good about following doctor’sorders so I need to find out what I’m dealing with.

b. Start regular exercise with cardio. Thiswas one of the doctor’s orders in TN, and I did well for a long time until lifestarted falling apart. Since life shouldbe stable now, I have to resume my regimen.

c. Get my hearing checked. I haven’tdone this since I was a kid, and during the past year, I find myself saying,“What?” frequently. Time to get checkedby an audiologist.
d. Investigate Lasik. This is something I have wanted to do for a long time, and this spring I am finally planning to talk it over with some doctors. If nothing comes of it, fine, but I'm tired of putting it off. What harm can come from educating myself?

2. Startvolunteering. I plan to sign up with our locallibrary and start volunteering there in January. Iwill see how it goes, and then I hope to add the Veteran’s Hospital to myvolunteer schedule. I don't want to do too much too quickly or else I will burn out. Start: January.

3. Take someSpanish classes. Every time Mike and I are aroundSpanish speakers, I feel very frustrated at the amount of Spanish I’velost. I am enrolling in a fewconversational Spanish classes this spring as part of the promise I made tomyself to become fluent. Start: January.

4. Learn some basicsewing techniques. I planned to do this in 2011, but I feel likethe whole world turned sideways last year soI am resurrecting this goal. Myfirst attempt will be via books. If thisfails, I will take a class at Michael’s or JoAnn’s Fabric. One way or another, I should be able to learna few new things. Start: no later than June.

5. Discover andimplement more eco-friendly habits and products. Recycling is a problem in our area, meaning thereare few places to do it. Living in anapartment, composting and organic gardening are more challenging. However, it can still be done. Start: immediately.

a. Eliminate all paper towels. I readthat baby burp clothes make wonderful substitutes for paper towels, and sincethey are reusable, they are perfectly eco.

b. Build our own small compostbucket/bin.

c. Carry a hand towel when traveling. Thisis a tough one to remember to do. I didhave a hand towel with me in Spainbecause they love the air vent dryers, which dry out my hands. It’s just tough to remember to use it.

d. Take storage containers with us to restaurants. I have been meaning to do this for months,but I forget to take ours with us. Thosestyrofoam containers are absolutely horrible for the environment plus youshould never ever reheat anything in them.

e. Make my own toilet bowl cleaner, “Pledge”, and window cleaner. Mine should be approaching the end, and I’d like totry my hand at homemade products.

6. Consistentlykeep a reading journal. I did ok with this in 2011 untilI started commuting between TN and MI with no internet access in TN. It all just fell apart. I’d like to try again in 2012. Start: immediately.

7. Invest ourhouse money. We need to set up a time to chat with ourfinancial adviser about where and how to invest the money from the sale of thehouse. The holidays sneaked up on us beforewe knew it so it didn’t get done in 2011. I’d like for Mike to get adjusted to his classes and work so I think a reasonablestart date is sometime in late January.

There is a theme to my goals this year, though it cannot be succinctly stated. I'd like to continue what I began in 2006 in NYC. I'd like to drop the excuses and strive to live in the present, in truth. That is difficult to itemize and impossible to set to a time table, however, so I made this list. Perhaps it will help keep me focused and help keep me moving in the right direction. I amoptimistic that the upcoming year will be a happier, more peaceful, focused and fun onethan the last one.

Are there any goals you’rewilling to share?

Can't get a post up

2011-12-31T14:13:00.000-05:00

I'm very frustrated over my lack of posting. We have been battling sinus infections and painting mom's office. When I get a few quiet minutes, I just don't feel like posting. I wanted to post about my wishes for the new year and my goals for the new year, but they may just have to wait until the new year. Ugh.

I hope everyone has a safe and fun night tonight, and I'll be posting again from Michigan.

Holiday lull

2011-12-27T21:53:00.003-05:00

Hope everyone had a good Christmas holiday. We have had a lovely time with family, and now friend-time is coming. The next few days will be filled with lunches and dinners with longtime friends. I just wanted to remind folks about the book poll. Only four votes seems sad. Let me know your opinion, if you have one, and I'll keep working on my goals-for-2012 post.

Blog mishap

2011-12-25T19:22:00.001-05:00

So sorry about the messed up blog. Mike and I figured out how to fix it, and it should be done. I took the poll down, but I will have it back up in a few minutes.

Hope you all had a Merry Christmas! Ours was wonderful. *smile*

Random nonfiction for January

2011-12-23T10:54:00.000-05:00

I’d like to start the reading polls again and hopefully do it every month in 2012. For January I picked four books at random using my Goodreads account and a random number generator. There are 255 books in my “to-read” file, and the names that came up were:

The War Lovers: Roosevelt, Lodge, Hearst, and the Rush to Empire, 1898 by Evan Thomas
In high school, I had a teacher who loved Teddy Roosevelt. As an adult, I discovered that T.R. wasn’t exemplary in all this thoughts and ideas (i.e. his hatred of American Indians). I’m curious about T.R.’s life before his presidency.

Outliers: The Story of Success by Malcolm Gladwell
Gladwell is a very interesting man, and I’ve had his books on my reading list for quite a while. In Outliers he attempts to answer the question why some people live highly productive lives and others never reach their full potential.

The Happiness Hypothesis: Finding Modern Truth in Ancient Wisdom by Jonathan Haidt
I think the title of the book sums this one up. Haidt is a social psychologist, whose book examines old maxims like “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” and “do unto others”. He seeks a deeper understanding into these old sayings and ideas.

Burning Books by Haig A. Bosmajian
Knowing how I feel about books, especially banned books, it shouldn’t be a surprise to see a book like this on my list. Bosmajian takes a look at book censors during the past 2000 years: who were the book burners, why were they burning books, and which books were burned?

By now, you know how this works. Just vote on the right hand side of the blog for the book that sounds the most interesting to you, and I’ll let you know what I think about it when I’m done. P.S. I know that I still have to read Escape and So Much for That from May. I will try to catch up quickly.

Gifts I would love to win

2011-12-23T10:38:00.002-05:00

Mike's new company has some amazing door prizes at their Christmas party: flat screen tv, $300 digital camera, a Wi, two iPod touches, and a zillion $25-$250 gift cards. How we ended up with nothing is amazing! My favorite gifts that I would probably never go buy for myself but would love:

1. iPad 2

Why? I have no idea. Isn't it a cool gizmo though???

2. Kindle Fire

I'm not a huge fan of e-readers, but Mike read four books during our Spain trip. That can get heavy! He may be traveling more with this company, and I think this would be a great gadget for him.

3. $100 American Express gift card (there were two of them there)

Duh, you can buy whatever you want/need.

4. $250 Coach gift card

If you're female and have to ask, I just don't know about you. A purse? Shoes? Sunglasses? Jewelry? Ahhhhh, it would have been niiiiiiiiiice.

What about you? Any gifts you won, wanted to win or just want?

Christmas is coming!

2011-12-21T18:35:00.002-05:00

We are busy preparing for the weekend. I'm trying to get a grip on the laundry and cleaning (paper clutter) before we leave. We have a cat-sitter / apartment sitter all set up, but I have to make sure there is plenty of food for the boys. I mailed the last of the Christmas cards tonight, and I have to return all our library books tomorrow. Soon I have to begin the packing process. Everything has to fit into our carry-ons since we don't check luggage anymore. *sigh*

What do you have left to do before the weekend?

Predictable

2011-12-18T11:59:00.002-05:00

I feel like we're the most boring, predictable people on the planet lately. Quite a change from the endless drama of the summer.

We are enjoying the cold weather and snow flurries.
Mike will be registering for grad school classes this week and trying to figure out if any of the classes from Chattanooga will transfer.
We will be packing and preparing for our southern holiday migration.
I have been thinking about my goals for 2012 so I can post about that a bit later in the month.

And that's about it. I hope this last Sunday before Christmas is a restful one for all you readers, and I will try to think up interesting things to post about in the upcoming days.

2011 Goals - final check in

2011-12-16T12:45:00.000-05:00

It's the end of the year, and it's time for that final goal check in.

Keep the thermostat set at 70 during the winter. Check. We may have to raise this to 72 here in MI. *smile*
Max out my IRA. Check.
Donate at least 50 items to charity. Check.
Sew a new long-sleeve shirt: end of December. Fail. I did find a tailor here in MI, and she's working on one of my wool coats right now. If I like her work, I may just have her make some fitted clothes for me.
Complete at least one bio sketch. I wouldn't call this a fail. I did complete personalized "books" for the great grandchildren of Frank Rogers and Mary Mildred Shuford Rogers, and like I said back in September, they aren't bio sketches but they are genealogical writings.
Read at least four books a month (not including childrens' or young adults' books). Check.
Keep a reading journal. Check and Fail. I did really well until August, and at this point I just have a list. I will try again in 2012.
Replace chemical cleaners with natural ones. Check and Fail. Juggling two residences, I did my best, but I will keep this up and try to do better in 2012.

Well, I think I did ok in 2011, especially when one considers all the drama: Mike's job hunt, folks in and out of hospitals, moving to MI (in steps), selling the house (over seven months), traveling, etc. I'm hoping for even bigger and better changes in 2012.

Broke losers

2011-12-16T12:31:00.003-05:00

I'm feeling a little overwhelmed this Christmas. I really don't feel like I've had enough time to breathe since selling the house (we still have boxes in the living room and our bedroom), and it's time for another trip! It's the first time since 2007 that I've had to book plane tickets for Christmas, and this year I'm also having to deal with rental cars, which are shockingly expensive over the holidays. A car for two days is nearly as expensive as a plane ticket! What the -?

Meanwhile, my holiday cards are suffering. I sent out about eight out yesterday, and I have about forty more to go. Ugh. I'm not gonna make it. In addition, last night was the family Christmas party for Mike's work. It was fun to meet so many interesting people, but the raffle was beyond weird. Mike, at one point, had a $100 American Express gift card, but it was "stolen" by his boss, who had it stolen from him so, in the end, we wound up with nothing. Some folks got gift cards, a flat screen t.v., a kindle fire, fancy camera, an iPad, and an iPod touch. We were losers. Wah-wah. Still, it was fun.

Movies

2011-12-11T11:09:00.001-05:00

We're still alive here in Michigan. We had a tiny snowfall on Friday, and the temps yesterday were absolutely frigid. We've been resting a lot, cleaning, and watching lots of movies.

First, we finally finished all the Horatio Hornblower movies. Loved those movies. They are based on C.S. Forester's novels about the late 18th / early 19th century British navy. (I also watched Peacekeepers/Warriors this week about the British peacekeepers in Bosnia. Powerful film.)

We also finally watched Get Low, which was released earlier this year. Man, I love Robert Duvall. The movie is about a hermit, played by the amazing Duvall, who wants to have a funeral party before his death so he can clear his conscience.

Just last night we finished Kingdom of War, which is a Thai movie with English subtitles. It relates (pretty accurately from what we can tell) how King Naresuan liberated the Siamese from the Burmese. I thought it was very, very interesting and well done. Certainly made me want to understand more about this part of the world.

Have you seen anything really good lately?

Taking a little break

2011-12-07T12:15:00.001-05:00

After our lovely vacation, I am having a bit of a let down. I suppose that's fairly normal. Mike got sick the last few days in Spain, and I am now feeling under the weather myself. Therefore, I'm taking a little blogging break. I've got to get myself together and get ready for the holidays. Just not feeling it yet.

The Canaries: part 3

2011-12-03T14:29:00.001-05:00

Tuesdaywas our last day in Tenerife, and we arrangedto go on a tour. Our first stop was inOrotavo. A volcano in this area eruptedand lit up the valley during Columbus’voyage in 1492. He wrote of it in hisjournals.

Mike was quite takenwith the architecture.

Ournext stop was in the Mt. Teide National Park. Weonly had thirty minutes to dash around and take photos. I will spare those uninterested involcanology the details of the formations. The area is still volcanically active, and the last major set of tremorsoccurred in 2003 though it is unknown if they were due to magma moving towardthe surface.

Wealso stopped at La Luna (The Moon) and took a few photos.

Ourlast stop was at a formation the locals call “the cake”. It’s a section of exposed rock that clearlyshows the different sedimentary layers.

Itwas also here that we watched the afternoon clouds roll over the valley floor.

Thiswas the day that I left my glasses on the bus, and we spent the remainder ofthe daylight hours running and calling. All was made right by evening though, and so ended our last day in Tenerife.

The Canaries, part 1
The Canaries, part 2

The Canaries, part 2

2011-12-02T22:04:00.001-05:00

Mondaywas a big day for us. We joined a tourgroup (the German group) and headed for Masca, on the western edge of theisland. I knew we were in trouble when everyone on the bus greeted us with“Guten morgen”. There were ten peopletotal, including the guide, and Mike and I were the only nonGermans. Mike did the best he could translating,considering he hasn’t studied German since he was in high school. The guide also did his very best, and therewas a woman on the tour who had lived in Australia for a while so she washelpful.

Wegot to the gorge, and I got scared. Fourmiles straight down for someone who spent the spring, summer, and fall drivingand sitting on her tush. This was goingto be brutal.

Masca gorge
The little "V" is the gorge, and we were going straight down to the ocean.

Actually, it was apleasant hike for the first two hours.

We even saw a coupleof mountain goats.

Thelast hour, however, was spent high-tailing it. Why? I have no idea. I started stumbling, as did some of theothers, and my poor little legs were aching for a break that never came.

Whenwe finally reached the bottom, a little orange cat clamored down out of therocks and led us to the ocean, which was beautiful.

Thewater was clear, warm, and Mike and I were prepared for a swim. For some reason, none of the others broughttheir suits, and they all wanted to leave as soon as we got there. I admit I was disappointed. The northern side of the island, where Puertode la Cruz is located, is much colder, and the water is rough so swimming (forus) was not possible. This would havebeen our chance. Oh well. We jumped on the boat – literally – with theothers and headed for Los Gigantes.

The other side of the gorge. Maybe you can make out the switchbacks.

LosGigantes was also beautiful and again no one wanted to stay and look around butus so we had to board the bus and head back. The trip back was miserable as the bus was too hot and I started gettingmotion sickness. I managed not to getsick on the bus, and we ended the day without incident. In fact, the guide left us with warm wishesand was very kind to us, expressing his gratitude for our patience and understandingon this “German” tour.

Docked at Los Gigantes.

Ifwe ever do return to Tenerife, I hope we will have the time and money to return toMasca and/or Los Gigantes for a nice swim and stroll – no gorge hiking nexttime.

As it turned out, I was right to be afraid. I wasn't in any pain that day, but the day after and for another two days, I was in agony whenever I had to walk down - stairs, slopes - any downward movement was extraordinarily painful. I need to start my Jillian workouts again, clearly.

The Canaries, part 1
The Canaries, part 3

The Canaries, part 1

2011-12-02T07:49:00.001-05:00

Thefirst few days in Tenerife were spent mostlyresting, sleeping, and walking languidly around Puerto de la Cruz.

OnSunday we walked down to the old part of town with the remnants of a convent, afort, and a very small castle.

The remnants of the convent can be seen on the left.

Mt. Teide, a dormant volcano on the island, taken fromPuerto de la Cruz

Forlunch we stopped at a restaurant near our hotel and ordered tuna salad (verypopular on the island) and potatoes with mojo sauce. The tuna is always the real fish not thecanned stuff, and the potatoes are boiled, rolled in salt, and then smothered(by you) in a green or red sauce. Thelatter is a common dish in the Canaries, and it was Mike’s favorite.

The Canaries, part 2
The Canaries, part 3

Home

2011-12-01T20:36:00.001-05:00

Just a short post to announce our safe arrival back into the United States. It's a strange feeling to back home where virtually everyone speaks the same language and understands "how to do things" (said from a totally ethnocentric point of view). Ahhh, the customs agent in Chicago was very friendly and made me so happy to be home. Loved Spain, but I sure do love home too!

Grounded

2011-11-30T10:56:00.001-05:00

Traveling is never easy, isit? Good thing it’s worth it. We will not be home tonight. Our flight out of Tenerife was delayed (whoknows why?), and we missed our flight from Madridto Miami (andall the flights to LA, NYC and DFW). Westood in line for 3.5 hours at the airline customer service area before beinggiven food and hotel vouchers. We arenow tucked into the Tryp Alameda Aeropuerta in Madrid. It’s a nicer hotel than the one on the island so we’re not tooupset. Mike will email work and explainthat he won’t be in tomorrow, and I will email our cat-sitter. Drama! It was worth it, but I can’t recommend the Madrid airport. It’s a maze and very long. I’m not a fan. We’ll have to go to Barcelonaor Valencia or Cadiz next time. *wink*

What's a vacation without a little drama?

2011-11-29T12:53:00.001-05:00

There will be no decent blog today either, I'm afraid. We took a tour of Mt. Teide, which was wonderfully fascinating, and I left my glasses - not my sunglasses, my GLASSES - on the bus. I'm sight-less (not 100% percent but maybe 60%)! I can barely read the screen as I type and only know to correct things when I see the red line under words. Oh, the stupidity! Fortunately, we were able to track down the driver, and I should have my glasses by 8:30 or 9 tonight. We have to be in the lobby at 5:30 a.m. for taxi to take us to the airport so I won't be blogging again (probably) until Thursday. We have lots of wonderful photos, and I think we are both sufficiently destressed and ready to move forward. Thanks, Tenerife!

Update: The wonderful tour company we used dropped my glasses off at the reception desk tonight! Yay, I can see again!

Deterred by the English

2011-11-29T01:43:00.001-05:00

My apologies for not blogging yesterday. I intended to blog after dinner last night but was derailed. Mike and I are gearing up for breakfast before a tour of Mt. Teide, an active volcano and the highest point in Spain. I doubt we'll be climbing up to the summit since that is a bit beyond the call for any tourist company. Of course, the geologist in me would love to hike it!

Unfortunately, I am horribly sore from our hike down the Masca Gorge so I doubt hiking is high on my list today. We took plenty of photos, which I will upload later this week. I was detained from blogging by two wonderful English ladies, friends visiting the island together. They were in their 60's and just lovely. We four chatted until late into the night.

I will attempt to begin blogging tonight about our Canarian experience, but if we meet more English at dinner, I'll be off chatting for sure!

The Signing

2011-11-27T10:05:00.001-05:00

Theweekend after the movers came and went we were offered full price if we wouldpick up the closing costs. We inquiredabout closing costs, and for some reason they were going to be exceptionallyhigh for our price bracket - $9,000. Ofcourse, our agent questioned their agent, and she was told that they had somespecial kind of loan that allowed a higher percentage. Before papers were signed, our agentcontacted their lender’s representative. She told our agent that they were getting a special loan that allowed fora higher rate. We weren’t thrilled aboutthe high closing costs, but we agreed.

Severaldays later our agent informed us that the lender’s rep had done the mathincorrectly. We were prepared to pay toomuch in closing, so the buyers agreed to split the “savings”. I will not lie. I was livid! Why should we split anything with them? We didn’t make a mistake! Afterquite a while of yelling (not at Mike or our agent just to them), we just split it. It wasn’t enough money to blow the deal over. Our agent wasn’t happy about it either, andshe said that she expressed this to everyone involved. (I’m trying not to be bitter over this. Sometimes you just have to let things go thatreally aren’t fair. See? I am growing up!)

Thefollowing day or two the lender’s rep (the one who made the math error)contacted the buyer’s agent via email and told her not to tell us about theerror, to just take the money under the table. The buyer’s agent hit the fan, our agent hit the fan, and Mike and Ilistened, stunned. Um, can anyone say“mortgage fraud”? Surprisingly, this didnot make me angry. Everyone else wasangry for us so there was little point wasting the energy.

Not longafter that, the lender’s rep started jerking us around on the closingdate. First, it was the 21^stthen the 11^th, which was a holiday, then the 10^th thenthe 15^th, which I couldn’t do due to appointments in Michigan, then back tothe 21^st. Again both agentswere highly annoyed. The reason the datewas changed from the 21^st to the 10^th, I don’t know. I’ve never heard of moving the date up likethat. The reason the date was pushedback was because of appraisal issues. When we heard this, we were both terrified. We were assured it was minor paperworkissues, but how can you know for sure?

Luckily,everything did get sorted out. We didmake it to the closing table. As itturned out, the corrected appraisal info didn’t make it to our lender so I satat the closing table with my agent for another hour. It all worked out and everyone got paid. Mike and I dropped the check off with thebank the morning of our flight out so our Tennessee adventure is officially at anend. Time for me to fully embrace Michigan. . . just assoon as the Canary trip is over!

2001 Gratitude: "Z"

2011-11-26T12:01:00.001-05:00

Mike suggested all kinds of crazy things for the letter "Z": zippers, Zeus, zest, zeal, and other things that escape me now. I think I will have to break with the alphabet here and go with joy.

"One joy scatters a hundred griefs."

~Chinese proverb

When Mike and I started on our trip, way back in Detroit, I would cry just thinking about it. Of course, he asked, "What's wrong?" and I told him that I was just so happy to be leaving all the sadness, the pain, and the troubles of the last few years behind.

I haven't cried at all here in the Canaries, but I am very, very happy. I am hopeful that this is the beginning of new and better things. Cheers for Spain, new beginnings, and joy!

"Know that joy is rarer, more difficult, and more beautiful than sadness. Once you make this all-important discovery, you must embrace joy as a moral obligation."

~Andre Gide, French author

"Conquering any difficulty always gives on a secret joy, for it means pushing back a boundary line and adding to one’s liberty."

~Henri Frederic Amiel, Swiss philosopher

2011 Gratitude: "Y"

2011-11-25T11:16:00.001-05:00

I am grateful this year especially for Yankee country. Definition of a Yankee, as defined by the Crossword Clue Solver website (emphasis mine):

an American
an American who lives in New England
an American who lives in the North (especially during the American Civil War)
used by southerners for an inhabitant of a northern state in the United States (especially a Union soldier)
Of or pertaining to a Yankee; characteristic of the Yankees.

Never meant as an insult, I love living in Yankee country. After all that time in Pennsylvania, I am much more comfortable there than in the south (in general). I am happy to be back in the world of funny accents and snow. I have missed it.

“The Yankee is one who, if he once gets his teeth set on a thing, all creation can't make him let go.”

~Ralph Waldo Emerson

2011 Gratitude: "X"

2011-11-24T15:42:00.001-05:00

Last year I chose the word xenophile/xenophilia, and this year I think I'll just stick with it.

“There are no foreign lands. It is the traveler only who is foreign.”

~Robert Louis Stevenson

Mike and I love to travel, but we've been unable to do very much of it in the last two years. The last time we left the country was in 2007 for a short trip to the Mayan Riviera. After all the drama of the last three years, we decided it was time to go again.

We spent the day (it's 8:45 p.m. here) flying, sleeping, and walking the beach in Puerto de la Cruz de Tenerife, Spain (one of the Canary Islands).

It hasn't felt much like Thanksgiving, but I did manage to find some turkey at the buffet tonight.

I am thankful this year (and always) for the love of foreign cultures and places, a spouse who also loves foreign cultures and places, and the ability (albeit a bit more limited than I would like) to travel to some of those places.

We hope you all had a wonderful day with your family and friends. Happy Thanksgiving!

“One’s destination is never a place, but a new way of seeing things.”

~Henry Miller

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

~Mark Twain

2011 Gratitude: "W"

2011-11-22T21:15:00.001-05:00

This day before Thanksgiving I am thankful for all the spitfire, passionate women in history, my life, and the world in general.

"There is in every true woman's heart, a spark of heavenly fire, which lies dormant in the broad daylight of prosperity, but which kindles up and beams and blazes in the dark hour of adversity."

~Washington Irving, The Sketch Book

I have written before about the strong, inspiring women in our past and present (Nov. 2008, May 2009, June 2009, etc.) so I'll keep this post short and simple.

I am thankful for all the women throughout history who fought for equality and women's rights.

I am thankful for all the women who teach their daughters self-respect, determination, courage, and integrity and who teach their sons to appreciate and admire those qualities.

I am thankful for all the women in my life who encourage me when things are down and show strength in grace in adversity.

"Women are supposed to be very calm generally: but women feel just as men feel; they need exercise for their faculties, and a field for their efforts as much as their brothers do; they suffer from too rigid a restraint, too absolute a stagnation, precisely as men would suffer; and it is narrow-minded in their more privileged fellow-creatures to say that they ought to confine themselves to making puddings and knitting stockings, to playing on the piano and embroidering bags."

Charlotte Bronte, Jane Eyre

"Look like a girl, act like a lady, think like a man and work like a dog."

~Caroline K. Simon, lawyer and politician

2011 Gratitude: "V"

2011-11-22T14:30:00.000-05:00

"When our perils are past, shall our gratitude sleep?"

~George Canning, British politician

It can come as no surprise that my word today is veterans.

But the freedom that they fought for, and

the country grand they wrought for,

Is their monument to-day, and for aye.

~Thomas Dunn English, "The Battle of the Monmouth"

I've written before about the vets in our families. Because I have had an ancestor fight in every American war from the Revolution to Vietnam, I feel like service to country is a part of who I am. It was a shadow in every room. I can't remember a time when I didn't know that my father, grandfather, and uncles served, but service, particularly in war, comes with a high price attached.

A few times I've gone to the VA medical centers with my dad. Once we were sitting in a waiting room with a WWII vet in a wheelchair, a Desert Storm vet, and a female Iraqi War vet. That was one of the saddest conversations I've heard. The woman was near tears as she told about her PTSD and her deep depression after coming home. Her husband left her with their daughter because he said he didn't know her anymore. She talked about how the war had changed her, and she knew it. She was seeing a psychiatrist, but it wasn't helping. The others nodded. The Desert Storm vet told about his wife leaving him, about the days without sleep, about the psychotic break downs.

Any person who loves a vet knows the sacrifice - the nightmares, the anxiety, the depression, the anger, the frustration, the racing thoughts, the pain. That pain is shared by everyone who loves that man/woman.

"In war, there are no unwounded soldiers."

~Jose Narosky, Argentinian writer

I am thankful this day and everyday for those men and women who serve this country and their spouses, their parents, their children, and everyone else who loves them. I may not support the wars, but I support and appreciate these service men and women. I will never forget the sacrifices that millions of Americans have made. Thank you.

"As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them."

~John F. Kennedy

"We often take for granted the very things that most deserve our gratitude."
~Cynthia Ozick, writer

Santa Cruz de Tenerife, Spain

2011-11-21T21:42:00.001-05:00

Thanks to everyone who voted in our little vacation poll. One of my sister-in-laws asked if we were going to go by the poll or if money was the main factor. The truth is money was the main factor, but as it turns out the Canaries were the least expensive location, which is a little surprising since we have to transfer to a smaller plane in Madrid, but, hey, who understands airlines these days?

We'll be leaving Wednesday afternoon for a week in the Canaries. We have a lady coming to watch our boys so they shouldn't be completely alone and sad while we're gone. I will sure miss them though!

Thanks again for providing us with your two cents! We'll post photos when we return.

2011 Gratitude: "U"

2011-11-21T18:11:00.001-05:00

One of my favorite quotes from John Irving in A Prayer for Owen Meany:
“Mrs. Hoyt was the first person I remember who said that to criticize a specific American president was not anti-American; that to criticize a specific American policy was not antipatriotic; and that to disapprove of our involvement in a particular war against the communists was not the same as taking the communists' side."

Let's face it, the letter "u" is a challenging one. I decided on the United States. I have discussed aspects of living in this country that I love (i.e. freedom, laws, civil disobedience, etc.), but I haven't put them all together until now.

"America is a nation with many flaws, but hopes so vast that only the cowardly would refuse to acknowledge them."

~James Michener, author

I am pretty quick to criticize the policies, wars, and general political stupidity that I see in Washington; but I am proud of the premise on which America was built - freedom. Unfortunately, our founders didn't get it all right. They were men of their times - good and bad. However, we've (however reluctantly or belatedly) extended freedom to those left out of the original plan.

We have had the privilege of meeting quite a few immigrants through the years, and we've heard many of them talk about the opportunities they have here, how much they longed to come here, and how much the love the United States. Honestly, I can't fully understand this. I've never lived anywhere else. I take for granted equal rights for women, labor laws, the right to protest, and probably a hundred other things.

While I will continue to object to unconstitutional wars, torture for any reason, and the total B.S. that happens in Washington D.C., I am very thankful to live in a country where I can give voice to those feelings without fear of imprisonment or death.

"We dare not forget that we are the heirs of that first revolution."

~John F. Kennedy

"America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves."

~Abraham Lincoln

It's brutal trying to sell a house these days.

2011-11-21T18:03:00.001-05:00

Rezoning

Withindays of listing the house, this very nice couple came out to see thehouse. They had been the only othercouple to look at it before we bought the house in 2009. They were interested in building a boatstorage facility in the back pasture.

I admit,I was not excited about this idea. We somuch wanted someone to raise animals here. BUT, you do not send potential buyers packing just because you don’tapprove of their building plans (unless it’s a brothel or something awful likethat), especially in this economy. Theoffer was marvelous so we accepted.

Thefirst challenge proved to be the undoing of the offer. The potential buyers contacted the countyabout rezoning the house to commercial, and they were shot down. That ended that.

Excavating

The nextcouple was, in our opinion, shady. Icannot give too many details because they are connected to one of Chattanooga’s wealthiest and most affluent families. . .or, they were connected to one of Chattanooga’s wealthiestand most affluent families. The jist oftheir offer was a price thirty thousand under appraisal (yes, $30,000 under theappraisal) plus testing of the septic line fields in the front yard and assessmentof the septic tank. Put holes all over the front yard for $30,000 underappraisal??? Yeah, thanks for stoppingby. No.

By thispoint, we were getting worried. We weresix months into this, and there were no reasonable, workable offers comingin. Oh, sure, people were still lookingat the house, but the showings weren’t yielding good offers.

In earlyOctober, we contacted the moving company. We had had enough of blow up beds and no furniture. It was time to really move.

2011 Gratitude: "T"

2011-11-18T17:52:00.001-05:00

This year I wanted to extend a special "thank you" and note of gratitude to all the teachers out there, particularly those who influenced me.

"A teacher affects eternity; he can never tell where his influence stops."

~Henry Brooks Adams, writer and historian

Teachers have such a difficult job, especially since the advent of No Child Left Behind. Good teachers not only have to juggle tedious (and oftentimes ridiculous) paperwork and meetings, unruly children, and obnoxious parents, but they also have to fret about their students' test scores and losing their jobs. All for the merest scrap of a salary.

My grandmother was a teacher, my aunt was a teacher, my father was a teacher, and I was a teacher (for a hot minute). It's a thankless, draining job. Oh, sure, you get good gifts at Christmas, but that hardly makes up for the long days, mountains of paperwork, and incessant biting from kids, their parents, and the administration.

I'm thankful (and surprised) that people still go into education. You are appreciated everyday even if we don't all say so everyday. Though it appears you are undervalued by society in general, many of us applaud and marvel at the career you've chosen. Thank you!

"Modern cynics and skeptics... see no harm in paying those to whom they entrust the minds of their children a smaller wage than is paid to those to whom they entrust the care of their plumbing."

~John F. Kennedy

"One looks back with appreciation to the brilliant teachers, but with gratitude to those who touched our human feelings. The curriculum is so much necessary raw material, but warmth is the vital element for the growing plant and for the soul of the child."

~Carl Jung, psychiatrist

2011 Gratitude: "S"

2011-11-18T17:32:00.001-05:00

I started having dates with insomnia in around 2003, but it didn't really become a problem until last year. It's not unusual for me to need over the counter sleeping pills every few weeks. If I'm under any kind of stress, I will use them a lot more. So, it will come as no surprise that I've used them a lot this summer and especially the past week. It seems very natural, therefore, to be thankful for sleep!

A flock of sheep that leisurely pass by

One after one; the sound of rain, and bees

Murmuring; the fall of rivers, winds and seas,

Smooth fields, white sheets of water, and pure sky -

I've thought of all by turns, and still I lie

Sleepless...

~William Wordsworth, "To Sleep"

"Now, blessings light on him that first invented sleep! It covers a man all over, thoughts and all, like a cloak; it is meat for the hungry, drink for the thirsty, heat for the cold, and cold for the hot. It is the current coin that purchases all the pleasures of the world cheap, and the balance that sets the king and the shepherd, the fool and the wise man, even."

~Miguel de Cervantes, Don Quixote

2011 Gratitude: "R"

2011-11-17T15:42:00.001-05:00

On this eighteenth day of gratitude, I am thankful for resolutions (or resolving issues).

“Resolve and thou art free.”

~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Our most complicated, difficult issue in 2011 was leaving Tennessee and all that entailed. Of that, selling the house was the worst. We put the house on the market in April, and we had two dozen showings, three offers, and one contract. In October we accepted an offer on the house, and on Monday we close. I have been reluctant to discuss it with anyone because more than one family we know has had deals fall apart within 24 hours of closing. I am hoping since I am posting after business hours on Friday that this will not happen to us. Should this deal go through on Monday, I will be sure to share the cliff notes edition of our house drama - from the couple who wanted to rezone to the couple that offered us thirty thousand under asking to the couple that wanted to excavate the front yard. Yes, it has been fun!

Despite all the insanity, I am thankful this might well be over in less than 72-hours, and 72-hours after that our feet might be on the ground somewhere in Europe. That would resolve other issues - the no-vacation-in-over-a-year issue and the no-long-vacation-since-2009 issue. Ah, if I had a glass, I'd lift it and say, "To resolutions!" but I haven't one.

“The difficulties you meet will resolve themselves as you advance. Proceed, and light will dawn, and shine with increasing clearness on your path.”

~Jim Rohn

P.S. Thanks to the thirteen people who have voted in the poll so far. You're the best thirteen voters!

2011 Gratitude: "Q"

2011-11-17T10:56:00.001-05:00

I am thankful this year for lots and lots of quality time with myself, my husband, and my family.

"Time lost is never found again."

~Benjamin Franklin

Right now I'm not working and periodically I am able (read "I have to") spend twenty hours on the road to check on the TN house. This gives me a LOT of time by myself to read, listen to music, think, just be quiet. I realize there are a lot of women out there my age who rarely have a moment's peace, a moment to sit still and be alone. I'm thankful I have that (at least for now).

Several years ago a coworker asked me how long Mike and I had been married, then she asked if Mike and I had any kids. When I said "no", she said, "You must really like each other." I just laughed and said, "Yeah, we do." Not only do many women my age not have time to themselves, they don't have a lot of time to spend alone with their husbands either. Our friends have said they can't go out on date nights or on vacations alone because they either can't afford it or feel guilty for leaving the kids (or have no one to leave the kids with!). I know they would never trade or give up their kids for anything, but I also know a night off would tickle them. I am thankful for all the years I've had with my very best friend, for the trips, the dinners, the long talks on Saturday mornings.

This year we had a couple family members and friends in the hospital for widely varying reasons. I do not advocate getting yourself or a loved one stuck in the hospital, but I will say those times have made me feel a closer connection to person I love. Something about being stuck in a room together for hours forms a bond, I think. That might not have been "fun time" but it was quality time spent together, and I'm thankful I had that with all of them. I hope 2012 brings more time with loved ones, though maybe out of the hospital this time.

"How you spend your time is more important than how you spend your money. Money mistakes can be corrected, but time is gone forever."

~David Norris, Irish politician

Please vote

2011-11-16T13:35:00.001-05:00

Just a request for you to vote, if you haven't already, on which European vacation sounds best to you. (I realize I spelled Bavaria wrong. Please don't judge. It was late at night, and I can't change it once someone has voted.) The original post on the subject is here. If we're very lucky and the good fairies shine on us, we might be able to book one of these trips last minute. We'd love to hear your opinion! It's anonymous so don't be afraid.

Thanks!

2011 Gratitude: "P"

2011-11-16T11:32:00.001-05:00

Today I am thankful for something that many Americans take for granted: peace.

"Peace is liberty in tranquility."

~Marcus Tullius Cicero

Peace. Quiet. Tranquility. Stillness. Calm.

Our cats and house drama are the only disturbances to our peace, for the most part. I don't have an abusive spouse. I am not at war with anyone. I do not fear tomorrow. I have come to realize that it's true for millions, maybe billions, of people - people who are beaten by loved ones, people who are living in refugee camps or hiding from bombs or madmen, people who don't know where their food will come from tomorrow.

I am thankful that live in relative peace. I am thankful for all the people past and present who made/make it possible - visionaries, leaders, soldiers, police, my family and many others.

"I think that people want peace so much that one of these days government had better get out of their way and let them have it."

~Dwight D. Eisenhower

"If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other."

~Mother Teresa

2011 Gratitude: "O"

2011-11-15T15:40:00.001-05:00

I am grateful this year for opportunities.

"Seize the opportunity by the beard, for it is bald behind."

~Bulgarian Proverb

I suppose it's cliché. However, I am thankful for the many opportunities to change a life, a situation, or a mind - especially my own! In the last year, I have done all of the above, and I'm thankful for it.

Last night I read a blog post by the Pike County Humane Society explaining their latest need. A good Samaritan found an injured dog while he was walking his dog on a trail in Pennsylvania. The post links to the whole story (I have shared the link on my FB page). It's actually a pretty horrific story. The dog was found shot through the chest with a crossbow. He had been out in the woods for days. His prognosis was doubtful, but he did make it through the surgery. The cost of his care is in excess of $3500, and the shelter (a no-kill shelter) can't afford to bear that burden in addition to their regular expenses. They are requesting donations for Bo, the injured dog, and have received $2000 so far.

As a matter of full transparency, I will say that Bo is a red pit bull. Do I just love pits? No. Would I necessarily own a pit? No. But I believe all animals deserve a chance; and I believe taking a dog out to the remote woods, shooting it with a crossbow, and leaving it to die of infection or starvation is monstrous and diabolical.

Because both our boys came from the PCHS and because we know the people who work there and their integrity, we decided to give money to help cover some of Bo's expenses. This was an opportunity for us to make a difference, maybe, for Bo and the shelter, and I wanted to pass it along to you all.

We all have many opportunities everyday to make a difference somewhere in some way. I am thankful for them this Thanksgiving, and I'm thankful for the people who have taken opportunities to make a difference in my life.

"Every day is an opportunity to make a new happy ending."

~Author Unknown

2011 Gratitude: "N"

2011-11-14T10:25:00.001-05:00

This Thanksgiving I am very thankful for new beginnings.

"Every day is a new beginning. Treat it that way. Stay away from what might have been, and look at what can be."

~ Marsha Petrie Suet, motivational speaker

I don't think there's much I can say on this subject that I haven't already said. It is wonderful to live in a time, in a country where you can start over - new job, new residence, new town - if you need to or want to.

"Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end."

~Seneca, philosopher

Dreaming of a Thanksgiving trip

2011-11-14T00:35:00.001-05:00

It's been over a year since Mike and I have been anywhere on vacation, and I was poking around tonight just dreaming. It turns out that several European destinations are around the same price for a six-day stay. I thought it would be fun to see what our readers thought.

First, I found the Canary Islands, which are actually closer to Morocco than Spain, but Spain owns them. That sounded relaxing, fun and exotic. Second, I thought of the Swiss Alps and found good deals in Interlaken. That trip would mean a flight into Zurich and then a train ride into the mountains for a zen vacation. Third, Fussen, Germany is in Bavaria and not too far from Munich so that trip would consist of a flight into Munich then a bus ride to Fussen to visit a couple of famous castles (namely, "Cinderella's castle"). Lastly, I thought of Naples, Italy. An exotic, romantic vacation with a tour to Pompeii included. Romance and geology together. Who could ask for more?

So, I put a poll up, and I'd love to see/hear what you think. Which Thanksgiving trip would you prefer? Is there another European spot you'd rather visit?

Edit: Shoot! I misspelled Bavaria in the poll. Don't judge. It was late.

2011 Gratitude: "M"

2011-11-13T12:07:00.001-05:00

On this thirteenth day of gratitude, I am thankful for good memories.

"What greater thing is there for two human souls than to feel that they are joined - to strengthen each other - to be at one with each other in silent unspeakable memories."

~George Eliot, Adam Bede

For me, one of the scariest and saddest aspects of growing old is the loss of memory. The last several years of her life, Mike's grandma lost her memories of her children and grandchildren. It was very sad and hard on some members of the family.

I am thankful that I remember the good things. Like most people, I try to forget the bad things as much as possible, but I like remembering the good times. I like hearing other people's good memories. Just makes me smile.

"Leftovers in their less visible form are called memories. Stored in the refrigerator of the mind and the cupboard of the heart."

~Thomas Fuller

2011 Gratitude: "L"

2011-11-12T10:24:00.001-05:00

On this twelfth day of gratitude, I am thankful for laughter.

"What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul."

~Yiddish Proverb

I love the sound of people laughing. Usually, I find it contagious - even those weird or crazy laughs. I read somewhere that people who laugh a lot live longer than those who rarely laugh. I have no idea if that's true.

I would tell you a funny story, but I'm sure I'd pick a you-had-to-be-there story, so I'll just leave it at "I am very thankful for people and situations that make me laugh".

"A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the doctor's book."

~Irish Proverb

2011 Gratitude: "K"

2011-11-11T10:08:00.001-05:00

I woke up this morning to an article in my inbox about a group coming to Detroit to spread hate under the banner of religion. They claim they are going to "drive the devil out" of Detroit. Of course, counter protesters will be there from area churches, synagogues, and mosques, and the unchurched will also be there. Hard times have been on Detroit for a while now. I understand a lot of people may or may not have sympathy for the corporate mucked-mucks, but it's in no way the fault of the little guys. Groups like this coming in preaching hate toward Muslims and gays do not help Detroit.

The news made me grateful #1 for counter protesters (who I'm thinking of joining) and #2 for kindness and compassion. People in need don't need to hear hate; they need to see kindness in action.

"Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see."

~Mark Twain

This Thanksgiving (as all year round) I'm thankful for the people who actively seek ways to benefit others, who are genuinely kind and compassionate.

In that vein, if you see someone wearing a veteran's cap, shirt, or a pin, just stop them to say "thanks". They might look at you a little strangely, but it will probably make them smile.

"If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion."

~Dalai Lama

"This man beside us also has a hard fight with an unfavouring world, with strong temptations, with doubts and fears, with wounds of the past which have skinned over, but which smart when they are touched. It is a fact, however surprising. And when this occurs to us we are moved to deal kindly with him, to bid him be of good cheer, to let him understand that we are also fighting a battle; we are bound not to irritate him, nor press hardly upon him nor help his lower self."

~John Watson, psychologist

2011 Gratitude: "J"

2011-11-10T11:17:00.000-05:00

On this tenth day of gratitude, I am thankful for Mike's job.

"When people go to work, they shouldn't have to leave their hearts at home."

~Betty Bender, motivational speaker, consultant, and trainer in communications and management development

In April Mike accepted his new job in Michigan, and he's really enjoying it so far. The office dynamics are more laid back and fun than his last company, and he'll be starting grad school in the spring on the company's dime. His coworkers have been very encouraging about grad school since most of them have Masters or Ph.D.s. In addition, he's already been to England once, and we're hoping that he gets to travel a bit more with this company.

So many people have lost their jobs and/or can't find work that it seems like a given to be grateful for any job but especially for a good, fun one.

Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life."

~Confucius

2011 Gratitude: "I"

2011-11-09T11:35:00.003-05:00

For the ninth day of gratitude, I have chosen imagination.

"Think left and think right and think low and think high. Oh, the thinks you can think up if only you try!"

~Dr. Seuss, Oh, the Thinks You Can Think!

I will admit that my own imagination is not routinely exercised; therefore, it's a bit weak, but I love seeing the creative, imaginative things folks come up with. I'm not into pinterest, but I do read a few crafty blogs. What great ideas some people have!

During my time at the Matthew Corozine Studio, I spent a lot of time exercising my imagination. Every week we had to have activities planned, and we'd be paired up spontaneously. We had to complete (or attempt to complete) our exercise while acknowledging and interacting with our scene partner. It was all improv. These were some of the most emotional times I've ever experienced, believe it or not. How fascinating is the human mind!

I am very thankful for all the imaginative, creative people out there. They make life so much more interesting and fun!

"It's not what you look at that matters, it's what you see."

~Henry David Thoreau

"Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things that escape those who dream only at night."

~Edgar Allan Poe

Let sleeping cats lie

2011-11-08T23:15:00.001-05:00

We put the dog bed under the bookcase so the boys would have a cave to hide in. It's a big hit with Spooky. He's there or under our bed most of the time.

Mittens loves the couch. He's been acting and feeling much better since we got the furniture.

2011 Gratitude: "H"

2011-11-07T22:01:00.001-05:00

On this eighth day of gratitude, I have chosen health.

"Health is a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being, and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity."

~World Health Organization, 1948

It's cliché, I know, but I am very grateful to have only minor health concerns.

Most of my life I have struggled with acne. It's a very emotionally painful and at times a physically painful problem. I, thankfully, wasn't teased (to my face, anyway), but it always bothered me. It became very bad a few years ago, and I have been under a doctor's care for quite a while. It's a condition that people with good skin can't really comprehend. Your self esteem suffers. You hide from everyone, even people who love you, because you're ashamed. It never mattered how much my family tried to reach out to me; I was always embarrassed and I hated going out. I'm thankful that it really isn't much of an issue anymore, but because I went through it, I have a lot of compassion for others with very visible maladies.

Aside from my acne and allergies, I don't have any physical issues. Oh, a pain here or there from time to time (a hazard of aging, I'm told), and those pains remind me to be grateful for good health.

I won't comment on my mental well-being. I feel mentally well, but I'm sure a few relatives or friends might beg to differ.

On the social side, I have some work to do this upcoming year. Having just moved, I'm a little short on Michigan friends, but I don't anticipate a problem making friends. People here are very friendly once you crack their shells.

So, this November I'm thankful for my physical health, my mental health, and am optimistic about my social health.

"Diseases of the soul are more dangerous and more numerous than those of the body."

~Cicero

"Just because you're not sick doesn't mean you're healthy."

~Author Unknown

2011 Gratitude: "G"

2011-11-07T17:08:00.002-05:00

Last year the word was "givers".

This year is a stretch. Wait for it. Genealogy. I know, you can't believe it, can you?

"The past is a source of knowledge, and the future is a source of hope. Love of the past implies faith in the future."

~Stephen Ambrose

I love family history. I guess I always have. My parents often talked about their families - grandparents, aunts, uncles, parents, siblings. My mom had a lot of things that belonged to her mom's mom, and I grew up around them. Then, of course, my dad's older sister is the family historian. She's the one ~~to blame~~ who got me started back in 2005. I had no idea what I was doing. I watched some documentaries, read some books and articles, and walked confusedly into a couple of courthouses. I've picked a few things up along the way, but I still have a whole lot to learn.

Learning about the lives of my relatives and Mike's is fascinating to me. It's so difficult for me to believe that some people just don't care. I have read some amazing love stories on Mike's side; discovered one of my relatives was a wretched, abusive monster; and suspect there's a horse thief in another branch of my tree. We both have plantations owners in our trees and Civil War vets on both sides. Way back on my mom's side, we're related to the signers of the Declaration of Independence, and some folks on Mike's mom's side were Tories. Isn't that interesting?

Call me crazy, but I love genealogy! I never get bored with it, and I've met a lot of people while doing it. I'm very thankful my aunt introduced me to the world of genealogy.

"To be ignorant of what occurred before you were born is to remain perpetually a child. For what is the worth of a human life unless it is woven into the life of our ancestors by the records of history?"

~Marcus Tullius Cicero

"It's a poor family tree that doesn't have either a thief or madam hanging from its branches."

~Author unknown

2011 Gratitude: "F"

2011-11-06T11:02:00.000-05:00

For "F" this year I chose finances.

I am thankful for healthy finances. In light of the recession, the depressed housing market, and the high unemployment rate, I believe everyone with a healthy savings and/or retirement account should be thankful.

Times are so bad for so many people. The local news out of Detroit is always full of bad financial news, especially for blue collar workers. Local food banks are having to turn people away, and long term unemployment benefits have run out. It's very sad to see so many people hurting.

During this season of reflection and gratitude, I am thankful for Mike's job, for insurance, for retirement accounts, and for our attitudes toward saving. One of my hopes for the new year is that our government and we as individuals can pull out of this deep financial mess.

"People are living longer than ever before, a phenomenon undoubtedly made necessary by the 30-year mortgage."

~Doug Larson, journalist

"In the old days a man who saved money was a miser; nowadays he's a wonder."

~Author Unknown

2011 Gratitude: "E"

2011-11-05T12:41:00.000-04:00

Last year's word was engineers.

This year for day five the word is education.

I am grateful for the researchers who discover and find information and for the teachers, writers and journalists who disperse it. Of course, that's only part of the puzzle. A person has to want to receive it.

I am so thankful to have grown up in house filled with books, and a dad who loved history. I was learning things without knowing it. My mom taught me about plants and gardening (and tried to teach me the basics of sewing), and my dad taught me about history and the English language. I'm not sure how I could have grown up without the love of knowledge being planted in me.

And so, I am thankful this year (and always) for everyone who picks up a book, a journal, or clicks on an article or blog to educate him/herself on a new subject. I am thankful we live in a time, in a place where we have access to knowledge and, therefore, education.

"The whole purpose of education is to turn mirrors into windows."

~Sydney J. Harris, journalist

"Education is a better safeguard of liberty than a standing army."

~Edward Everett, educator and politician

Tarra and Bella

2011-11-04T22:18:00.001-04:00

Not sure if anyone is familiar with the Elephant Sanctuary in Hohenwald, Tennessee, where sick, old, or "needy" elephants can live on 2,700 acres in peace. I first became familiar with it after reading a wonderful children's book called Just for Elephants by Carol Buckley.

The sanctuary has been featured on the news for one unusual friendship. Tarra, an Asian elephant, befriended a stray dog who wandered onto the sanctuary. The staff named her Bella. The two were constantly together unless one was off exploring.

Sadly, on Wednesday, October 26, after eight years at the sanctuary, Bella was found dead. Apparently, she was attacked and killed by coyotes. Tarra has been spending time with some of the other elephants since Bella's death.

CBS News covered the story on tonight's evening news. I thought it was so very sad. Their relationship, however "anthropomorphic" some people may call it, further convinces me that animals do, in fact, have feelings. Do I believe they are the same as humans? Not necessarily, but I do believe they feel "love" or intimate connection, sadness, joy, and fear. I think scientists have it all wrong when the say animals don't feel or have emotions. I just don't buy it.

If you'd like to watch the CBS News piece, just lick below but have a tissue handy.

http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-18563_162-57319021/tarra-and-bella-elephant-loses-mans-best-friend/

2011 Gratitude: "D"

2011-11-03T21:21:00.004-04:00

Last year it was diversity.

This year it's something a bit lighter, a bit fluffier: desserts.

"Stressed spelled backwards is desserts. Coincidence? I think not!"

~Author Unknown

Yes, that's right. Desserts. I love me some desserts. Mike and I wandered into a Mexican bistro in downtown Rochester called Rojo, and they serve the most amazing cake I have ever put in my mouth. It's a version of tres leches cake (three milk cake).

This is not theirs, but it looks a whole lot like it. They use two layers of cake separated by a layer of strawberries and soak the whole thing overnight in "milk" (it's a mixture of things really). Oh. My. Stars. Amazing. I found out that I can buy 10 pieces, which is really more like 20 pieces because the pieces are so large, for $40. I know that's a little pricey for cake, but it's the most amazing cake. Sure, one piece has literally about 625 calories and 33g of fat, but every now and then it's a marvelous treat.

I am thankful for bakers and their products. I'm just thankful for sweets in general.

"I want to have a good body, but not as much as I want dessert."

~Jason Love

2011 Gratitude: "C"

2011-11-03T10:44:00.001-04:00

Last year on day three, I was grateful for college.

This year I choose civil disobedience.

"As long as the world shall last there will be wrongs, and if no man objected and no man rebelled, those wrongs would last forever."

~Clarence Darrow

the Boston Tea Party
the abolition of slavery
women's suffrage
the Civil Rights' movement
the fight for labor laws
anti-war protests
Now we see the Occupy protests.

Whether you are fan or not, civil disobedience is a very American way to institute change.
The Boston Tea Party helped fuel a revolution, which ended with independence.
The abolition of slavery legally freed a race of people.
Women's suffrage started to level the playing field for women.
The Civil Rights' movement took abolition another step farther and demanded equality for minorities.
The labor laws created a limit to work hours, improved labor conditions, and got kids out of work mills.
Some argue that anti-war protests have help end wars.
Who knows what the Occupy protests will bring?

I'm grateful for the protesters that helped win America's independence, freedom for slaves, voting rights for women, equality for minorities, better working conditions for everyone, and perhaps fewer lost lives in war. I'm also grateful for the quiet protesters, like the people who hid Jews during Hilter's reign of terror or the Muslim women hosting banned book readings in their homes. All these folks make the world a better place.

"You're not supposed to be so blind with patriotism that you can't face reality. Wrong is wrong, no matter who says it."

~Malcolm X

"Never do anything against conscience even if the state demands it."

~Albert Einstein

2011 Gratitude "B"

2011-11-02T11:23:00.000-04:00

Last year on day two, I was grateful for books.

This year I choose best friends.

I'm not talking about the people at work you occasionally go to lunch with or those friends from high school you keep up with on Facebook. I mean close, intimate friendships. I mean the kind of relationships where you share your whole heart.

Recently I said good-bye to the staff at the allergy clinic in Chattanooga where Mike and I were treated. I chatted with the receptionists for a long time. They got to know Mike and I well because we'd come in together for our weekly shots. One of the ladies said her husband wanted them to move to Georgia so they could be closer to his job, and she said, "I just can't leave my family. They are my only friends. I don't have friends outside my family." I completely and totally understand her.

My dearest, closest friends are related to us, with a few exceptions. I'm just an open book with them. Sometimes people don't like that or don't know what to do with that, but I'm that way with them because I love and trust them completely. They know my political views and my religious views (a true test of any relationship). They know my dreams and plans (as best as I know them). They just know me. I love it!

If I tried to name everyone, I know I'd leave someone out and/or hurt someone's feelings so I won't try. I'm pretty sure they know who they are.

I am grateful to all my best friends who know the real me and don't judge.

Be courteous to all, but intimate with few, and let those few be well tried before you give them your confidence.

~ George Washington

Friendship is a single soul dwelling in two bodies.

~ Aristotle

2011 Gratitude "A"

2011-11-01T11:42:00.000-04:00

Last year I went through my thankful list via the alphabet. I was torn this year as to whether I should do the same or start something different. I haven't 100% decided actually, but I think I'll work off last year's to make it specific to this year, and when I feel like it, I'll just change the word.

For "A" I'll stick with last year's word and update it: adversity.

The last year has been a painful, stressful one. When I was writing last year's list, I knew we'd be leaving Chattanooga. It was a very difficult decision, but Mike couldn't find another job in the area. In the spring, more difficult situations arose, but as a family we dealt with them. The last two years have tested most of my relationships. Sadly, a few have dissolved because folks just weren't who I thought they were, but more often my ties have become stronger.

I'm grateful for the bad times for bringing me closer to the ones I love - my family, my husband, my dearest friends. I'm grateful for the situations that forced a move to Michigan, though I am still struggling to let go of the bitterness. I am grateful for hospital visits that pushed the good relationships closer and revealed false friendships.

I don't wish for more difficult days, but when they are over, I can usually see the good that resulted.

"If you're going through hell, keep going."
~Winston Churchill

"If I had a formula for bypassing trouble, I would not pass it round. Trouble creates a capacity to handle it. I don't embrace trouble; that's as bad as treating it as an enemy. But I do say meet it as a friend, for you'll see a lot of it and had better be on speaking terms with it."
~Oliver Wendell Holmes

Edit: I don't mean to come off sad or depressed even though the subject matter is a bit depressing.

Halloween

2011-10-31T21:13:00.000-04:00

Another year has past with no trick-or-treaters. This is the fourth year in a row in three different dwellings in two different states. I guess parents are much more suspicious and cautious now than when Mike and I grew up.

Every year until maybe sixth grade I would dress up, and mom would drive to a larger, local neighborhood. We'd walk around until one or both of us was tired. It was so much fun. It's weird that there are no pictures of our Halloweens.

I never understood what a sacrifice those Halloween nights were for my mom until I was an adult. She worked between 40 and 50 hours a week on her feet and out in fields, and she still mustered up the energy to pick me up from after school care and take me trick-or-treating for hours.

Thanks, mom, for making Halloween one of the best nights of the year.